Thursday, December 31, 2009
Goodbye, Double-Oh Decade
Hey everybody, I just want to drop in here and say a few words before the year is up.
First off, the vacation is going great. I was nervous about the baby but it turns out he loves America and everyone in it. Strangers and family alike delight him, he is being spoiled with toys and clothes at every turn, and he is sleeping here like he never sleeps back home. Not necessarily at night, mind you, but a happy, well-rested baby is a hell of a lot easier to manage than a cranky, crying baby.
In professional writing news, Wired Game|Life has been posting best-of lists recently, several of which I got to vote for and contribute towards. While I recommend all of their fine work, readers looking specifically for my words should direct their attention to Top 5 PlayStation 3 Games of 2009, The 10 Best Videogames of 2009 and The 15 Most Influential Games of the Decade. I'm particularly proud of that last one because I got to write about two of my favorite games of the last ten years, both of which will be appearing in my love/hate 00s countdown.
Speaking of which, the countdown is on hold but not over. I haven't had much time to write on this trip, so I'll finish my thoughts about my favorite and most disappointing things of the past decade after it is complete.
In the meantime, enjoy this final day of the 00s. For those of you in Japan, the year is nearly finished, but here in the US we've got nearly an entire day to get through. Wherever you're at, have fun and I'll see you in 2010 (digitally speaking).
つづく...(Click here to read more)
First off, the vacation is going great. I was nervous about the baby but it turns out he loves America and everyone in it. Strangers and family alike delight him, he is being spoiled with toys and clothes at every turn, and he is sleeping here like he never sleeps back home. Not necessarily at night, mind you, but a happy, well-rested baby is a hell of a lot easier to manage than a cranky, crying baby.
In professional writing news, Wired Game|Life has been posting best-of lists recently, several of which I got to vote for and contribute towards. While I recommend all of their fine work, readers looking specifically for my words should direct their attention to Top 5 PlayStation 3 Games of 2009, The 10 Best Videogames of 2009 and The 15 Most Influential Games of the Decade. I'm particularly proud of that last one because I got to write about two of my favorite games of the last ten years, both of which will be appearing in my love/hate 00s countdown.
Speaking of which, the countdown is on hold but not over. I haven't had much time to write on this trip, so I'll finish my thoughts about my favorite and most disappointing things of the past decade after it is complete.
In the meantime, enjoy this final day of the 00s. For those of you in Japan, the year is nearly finished, but here in the US we've got nearly an entire day to get through. Wherever you're at, have fun and I'll see you in 2010 (digitally speaking).
Labels: family, number one son, site news, travel, video games, Wired, writing
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
En Vacances until 2010
By the time this post goes live, I'll be on my way to New York with my family in tow. Maybe Go will fall asleep on the plane and maybe he won't. Either way we will be spending the next two weeks in the United States.
I am, understandably, nervous about this trip. Even taking the airplanes out of the equation there's going to be a lot of traveling and I have no idea how Go will respond. Will he become jet lagged and sleep all day while keeping us up all night?
Ultimately it's up to me whether this trip is enjoyable or not. Go is going to do what he's going to do - it's out of my control. We're taking him to America so his grandparents and extended family can see him in person. It reminds me of last March when we took Mako's parents to New York. Their needs trumped ours, because they could not function without our assistance. Did I still enjoy myself? Hell yeah.
The key difference this time is that Mako's parents are, once provided with food and shelter, self-sufficient. We could bring them food and leave them in their hotel room for an evening. Go would not enjoy that.
So I don't know what to say. Am I excited? Of course? Am I nervous? Very much so. Am I scared? Nope. Worst case scenario, I go without sleep for two weeks while surrounded by friends and family. That beats spending another New Year's in Japan in front of the damned television, forced to watch an endless parade of celebrities sing and congratulate each other.
Also, I cannot predict my availability online. I'm bringing my netbook but I can't say how much time I'll be able/willing to sit in front of it. I hope to keep writing my list of my favorite and most disappointing things of the decade, as I'm only a third of the way finished.
So please forgive me if I miss out on Twitter or Facebook chatter. I'll see many of you in person soon. To everyone else, I'll catch you right here next year. FEIT...out
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I am, understandably, nervous about this trip. Even taking the airplanes out of the equation there's going to be a lot of traveling and I have no idea how Go will respond. Will he become jet lagged and sleep all day while keeping us up all night?
Ultimately it's up to me whether this trip is enjoyable or not. Go is going to do what he's going to do - it's out of my control. We're taking him to America so his grandparents and extended family can see him in person. It reminds me of last March when we took Mako's parents to New York. Their needs trumped ours, because they could not function without our assistance. Did I still enjoy myself? Hell yeah.
The key difference this time is that Mako's parents are, once provided with food and shelter, self-sufficient. We could bring them food and leave them in their hotel room for an evening. Go would not enjoy that.
So I don't know what to say. Am I excited? Of course? Am I nervous? Very much so. Am I scared? Nope. Worst case scenario, I go without sleep for two weeks while surrounded by friends and family. That beats spending another New Year's in Japan in front of the damned television, forced to watch an endless parade of celebrities sing and congratulate each other.
Also, I cannot predict my availability online. I'm bringing my netbook but I can't say how much time I'll be able/willing to sit in front of it. I hope to keep writing my list of my favorite and most disappointing things of the decade, as I'm only a third of the way finished.
So please forgive me if I miss out on Twitter or Facebook chatter. I'll see many of you in person soon. To everyone else, I'll catch you right here next year. FEIT...out
Labels: family, predicting the future, site news, travel
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Belated Birthday, Timely Podcast
Yesterday was my birthday, and as a present to myself I decided not to spend the last hour or so of the day trying to write something profound about turning 33. Instead, I played Bayonetta* for about an hour and had fun. Honestly, it's been over a week since I played any game simply for the fun of it so I deserved that break. And so far, Bayonetta is lot of fun.
Oh yeah, check out the lovely birthday present I received from my lovely wife:
Speaking of games and fun, I made another appearance on The Dofuss Show, Alex's homemade gaming podcast. Last time we talked about TGS for a couple hours weeks after the show had ended, but this time we are a bit more topical. Here's an overview of what we discussed:
In other news, I am in the process of submitting stories to Wired Game|Life concerning my trip to Games Japan Festa last weekend. I will share any posts once they are approved. In the meantime you might be happy to hear that another one of my English stories was translated into Japanese (check it out). This doesn't mean any extra money for me or anything, but I do get a real kick out of seeing my name (and a photo I took) on Japanese websites. Once WiredVision carries a story, other Japanese sites tend to rehash that story elsewhere, so my name does get around.
I'm really looking forward to this three-day weekend. Mako's parents are going to watch Go for us so we can spend Saturday together as a couple. There's also a gaming party on Monday that sounds like a blast. Alas, I'd trade it all for a trip home for Thanksgiving. Turkey is so hard to find in this country!
*Read that Wikipedia article very carefully by the way...particularly the Pre-Release section! OMG
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Oh yeah, check out the lovely birthday present I received from my lovely wife:
Speaking of games and fun, I made another appearance on The Dofuss Show, Alex's homemade gaming podcast. Last time we talked about TGS for a couple hours weeks after the show had ended, but this time we are a bit more topical. Here's an overview of what we discussed:
- My recent article on Wired Game|Life concerning crane games filled with desserts
- My fondness for Kongregate.com
- Alex's experience (and general distaste with) Sony's PlayFace campaign
- He has finished Bayonetta and Uncharted 2 but is still plodding through Wii shovelware like Ultimate Band
- I like Burnout Paradise even though I hate racing games
- My Left 4 Dead 2 thoughts segue into the news concerning its censorship in Australia
- Neither of us wants to play Modern Warfare 2 but we have some words over its infamous "F.A.G.S." viral video
- Remember my Bitmob piece on grinding? Alex disagrees with me
- Speculation about the future of the DSiLL, with anecdote from Gwyn's blog
- Darren's Old Games: Cybernator is better than you
In other news, I am in the process of submitting stories to Wired Game|Life concerning my trip to Games Japan Festa last weekend. I will share any posts once they are approved. In the meantime you might be happy to hear that another one of my English stories was translated into Japanese (check it out). This doesn't mean any extra money for me or anything, but I do get a real kick out of seeing my name (and a photo I took) on Japanese websites. Once WiredVision carries a story, other Japanese sites tend to rehash that story elsewhere, so my name does get around.
I'm really looking forward to this three-day weekend. Mako's parents are going to watch Go for us so we can spend Saturday together as a couple. There's also a gaming party on Monday that sounds like a blast. Alas, I'd trade it all for a trip home for Thanksgiving. Turkey is so hard to find in this country!
*Read that Wikipedia article very carefully by the way...particularly the Pre-Release section! OMG
Labels: Alex, Bayonetta, family, friends, podcast, The DoFuss Show, video games, Wired, writing
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, November 09, 2009
For My Sister
Kind of a special day today. Twenty years ago, the Berlin Wall came down...on my sister's Nth birthday. Is it silly that both of these anniversaries are battling for my thoughts?
Yes, it is!
I mean, it goes without saying that my sister's birth was the more momentous occasion in my life. I have only vague memories of going to the hospital that day, and I doubt very much that nearly-three-year-old me had any concept of what a new baby meant. Records from that time suggest I didn't take to my new sibling very well, as I began taking out my frustrations on other children at nursery school. I actually became a bully during this time, if you can believe that.
Our relationship had real ups and downs as the years passed. There were times where we found common interests and played games together, but there were also times when I believe we seriously hated one another. It rarely manifested itself physically, but there was a lot of tension in the house by the time we were both in high school. Then again, with my parents' divorce I guess the entire family was quietly tearing itself apart so two kids arguing wasn't really a big deal.
Things improved vastly once the four of us were no longer expected to live in the same house anymore. First it was Mom and Dad that separated, then Salena started college and I moved out shortly after that. I can remember going through a lot of difficult personal issues at that time, but at least fighting with my sister was no longer one of them. It didn't take long for our relationship settle in a very cordial position and I think it's stayed there ever since.
When I look at my son and I see myself (let's face it, he looks just like me) I often wonder what would happen if we had another baby. It's obviously something Mako wants, and I think deep down I want it too. I think back to the bad times my sister and I had, of course, but as nasty as things got that can't overshadow the years of good times, particularly as adults in the last decade or so. Go and his theoretical younger sibling would clash over dumb things like the television remote and who got to sit on the pillow in the backseat of the car, but eventually the two of them would be able to go to the movies together and laugh at their parents' behavior.
Let's face it; a brother or sister is often the only person you can really talk to about your parents. If Salena hadn't been there to commiserate with, I would have needed twice as many psychologists and therapists to discuss all the stuff that went on in my head. In my mind I see myself being a loving and attentive father, but I'm going to make mistakes. When that happens, won't Go need a safety valve, a partner in crime, a comrade-in-arms?
Alright, I've turned this birthday greeting into a tortured look at my own past/horrible vision of Go's future. My point is, my sister means a lot to me despite the fact that we now only see each other once or twice a year, tops. If we never spoke again I'd owe her for the years that she was there for me. I certainly didn't offer much older brotherly advice in the ways of the world; hell, for years she was the one doing everything right and I was the one who needed guidance.
So thank you, Salena, for *cough cough* years of being there for me and nevermind the three or four when we made each other miserable. I know you're in the middle of a lot of stuff right now and I can only hope that my recent happiness has, in some small way, helped you figure out what you want to do next. If yes, I still owe you, but at least I could partially make up for the time when I wasn't much of a brother.
Happy Birthday.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Yes, it is!
I mean, it goes without saying that my sister's birth was the more momentous occasion in my life. I have only vague memories of going to the hospital that day, and I doubt very much that nearly-three-year-old me had any concept of what a new baby meant. Records from that time suggest I didn't take to my new sibling very well, as I began taking out my frustrations on other children at nursery school. I actually became a bully during this time, if you can believe that.
Our relationship had real ups and downs as the years passed. There were times where we found common interests and played games together, but there were also times when I believe we seriously hated one another. It rarely manifested itself physically, but there was a lot of tension in the house by the time we were both in high school. Then again, with my parents' divorce I guess the entire family was quietly tearing itself apart so two kids arguing wasn't really a big deal.
Things improved vastly once the four of us were no longer expected to live in the same house anymore. First it was Mom and Dad that separated, then Salena started college and I moved out shortly after that. I can remember going through a lot of difficult personal issues at that time, but at least fighting with my sister was no longer one of them. It didn't take long for our relationship settle in a very cordial position and I think it's stayed there ever since.
When I look at my son and I see myself (let's face it, he looks just like me) I often wonder what would happen if we had another baby. It's obviously something Mako wants, and I think deep down I want it too. I think back to the bad times my sister and I had, of course, but as nasty as things got that can't overshadow the years of good times, particularly as adults in the last decade or so. Go and his theoretical younger sibling would clash over dumb things like the television remote and who got to sit on the pillow in the backseat of the car, but eventually the two of them would be able to go to the movies together and laugh at their parents' behavior.
Let's face it; a brother or sister is often the only person you can really talk to about your parents. If Salena hadn't been there to commiserate with, I would have needed twice as many psychologists and therapists to discuss all the stuff that went on in my head. In my mind I see myself being a loving and attentive father, but I'm going to make mistakes. When that happens, won't Go need a safety valve, a partner in crime, a comrade-in-arms?
Alright, I've turned this birthday greeting into a tortured look at my own past/horrible vision of Go's future. My point is, my sister means a lot to me despite the fact that we now only see each other once or twice a year, tops. If we never spoke again I'd owe her for the years that she was there for me. I certainly didn't offer much older brotherly advice in the ways of the world; hell, for years she was the one doing everything right and I was the one who needed guidance.
So thank you, Salena, for *cough cough* years of being there for me and nevermind the three or four when we made each other miserable. I know you're in the middle of a lot of stuff right now and I can only hope that my recent happiness has, in some small way, helped you figure out what you want to do next. If yes, I still owe you, but at least I could partially make up for the time when I wasn't much of a brother.
Happy Birthday.
Labels: anniversary, family, fuzzy memories, number one son, predicting the future
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, October 19, 2009
Grandpa in Japan
As of this writing, my father is already on his way back to New York. He only got here last Tuesday so it was a short visit but a very important one. This was, after all, his first chance to see Go in person.
We didn't "do" much in a travel sort of way. Dad stayed in a hotel in Osaka and rode the train out to our apartment each day to see us. On most days, he simply stayed here until he got tired and then returned to the hotel. He always came up in the afternoon so my inability to get off work wasn't an issue. He offered to take us to dinner but we instead ended up eating at home.
I guess I shouldn't have been surprised but my dad really, really adored Go in a way that I never would have expected. He was delighted by Go's every move and found no frustration in Go's occasional fits of crying. He also had an incredible knack for putting a smile on Go's face and making him laugh so hard he got hiccups.
We all forget that our parents were there when we were just babies, making us smile and putting up with our tears. I had never seen my father with a baby before, so even though logic dictated that he had seen his share of tiny humans I assumed that he had forgotten what it was like as my sister and I are both full-grown adults now. Instead, he flourished and he and Go were very happy together.
Two things jump to my mind as cute moments from his visit. The first was on Friday night when we ordered pizza. My father and I both had root beer, specifically Dad's Root Beer. It's just a name, I know, but it carried an extra bit of meaning that night to be sharing such a drink with my father while we both looked at my son.
The second was our good fortune to be able to watch two Yankees games together over the weekend. He wasn't here for the start of either game (8 PM EST = 9AM JST) but he made in time for most of the late-inning drama. Having three generations of Feits sit on a couch and watch a baseball game had a magical quality to it, even though there's no way of knowing if Go will share our interest in the Yankees or the game of baseball for that matter.
We did meet up with Mako's parents over the weekend and get outside for a while. On Saturday we went to their home (a first for my dad) and went shopping at the nearby mall where we got some Cold Stone ice cream (another first for my dad). They've stepped up their game, by the way: now when the servers start singing, they flicker the lights on and off. Epileptics beware!
Sunday we took a surprisingly long drive two cities over to Mino-o (Minoh?) and spent a couple hours at Katsuoji. It's a very beautiful temple in the mountains that I'm sure will look even better in a couple weeks when the leaves change. Since my dad was leaving during the day today while I was at work, we had to have our goodbyes outside of a random train station in Minooooo which was a little awkward. At least we all know I'm coming to New York in December so it was more of a "see you later" than a "see you when I see you" goodbye.
I'll try to get some pics up for everyone to see. Until then, check out these two photos I snapped with my camera:
つづく...(Click here to read more)
We didn't "do" much in a travel sort of way. Dad stayed in a hotel in Osaka and rode the train out to our apartment each day to see us. On most days, he simply stayed here until he got tired and then returned to the hotel. He always came up in the afternoon so my inability to get off work wasn't an issue. He offered to take us to dinner but we instead ended up eating at home.
I guess I shouldn't have been surprised but my dad really, really adored Go in a way that I never would have expected. He was delighted by Go's every move and found no frustration in Go's occasional fits of crying. He also had an incredible knack for putting a smile on Go's face and making him laugh so hard he got hiccups.
We all forget that our parents were there when we were just babies, making us smile and putting up with our tears. I had never seen my father with a baby before, so even though logic dictated that he had seen his share of tiny humans I assumed that he had forgotten what it was like as my sister and I are both full-grown adults now. Instead, he flourished and he and Go were very happy together.
Two things jump to my mind as cute moments from his visit. The first was on Friday night when we ordered pizza. My father and I both had root beer, specifically Dad's Root Beer. It's just a name, I know, but it carried an extra bit of meaning that night to be sharing such a drink with my father while we both looked at my son.
The second was our good fortune to be able to watch two Yankees games together over the weekend. He wasn't here for the start of either game (8 PM EST = 9AM JST) but he made in time for most of the late-inning drama. Having three generations of Feits sit on a couch and watch a baseball game had a magical quality to it, even though there's no way of knowing if Go will share our interest in the Yankees or the game of baseball for that matter.
We did meet up with Mako's parents over the weekend and get outside for a while. On Saturday we went to their home (a first for my dad) and went shopping at the nearby mall where we got some Cold Stone ice cream (another first for my dad). They've stepped up their game, by the way: now when the servers start singing, they flicker the lights on and off. Epileptics beware!
Sunday we took a surprisingly long drive two cities over to Mino-o (Minoh?) and spent a couple hours at Katsuoji. It's a very beautiful temple in the mountains that I'm sure will look even better in a couple weeks when the leaves change. Since my dad was leaving during the day today while I was at work, we had to have our goodbyes outside of a random train station in Minooooo which was a little awkward. At least we all know I'm coming to New York in December so it was more of a "see you later" than a "see you when I see you" goodbye.
I'll try to get some pics up for everyone to see. Until then, check out these two photos I snapped with my camera:
Labels: baseball, family, Japan, number one son, temple, Yankees
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Dads and Pods
Wow, did it ever get cool around here in a hurry. I'm wearing my Yankees hoodie all day now and not just to brag - it's genuinely chilly in the early morning and at night we actually close the windows to keep warm. I'm not complaining as I welcome the change, but I didn't expect it so soon and so swiftly.
The big news right now is that my dad is here. He came in Tuesday night from Hong Kong, his first ever visit to China. Believe it or not, he didn't eat any Chinese food while he was there, but if you know him there's a reason for that. I have to go to work for the rest of the week but I gave him explicit written instructions on how to ride the trains to my apartment. When I walked in the door yesterday, he was standing there meeting my son and his grandson for the first time. It was a sweet moment.
He's here until Monday so I won't have much time to write. However, I can promise you that I have not forgotten what day it is today (ten years, wow!) and my Tokyo Game Show tale will be ready very, very soon. I also finished reading The Fountainhead and I feel like I need to talk about it.
Oh, but speaking of TGS, here's some more big news: my first podcast! Okay, it's not MY podcast but Alex's own DoFuss Show. We spoke over Skype this weekend about the show for two hours and he edited that together with some interviews he did and a conversation with his usual podcast partner, Darren. Unfortunately, we couldn't work out a time when all three of us could speak, but I think this is was a reasonable compromise. I do hope to talk to them again, possibly later this month when Darren comes to Japan.
You can download the MP3 at Alex's site. I haven't heard it yet but I'm looking forward to weirding myself out by listening to my own voice on my iPod. And yes, all of this is reminding me that I should try making a podcast sometime.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
The big news right now is that my dad is here. He came in Tuesday night from Hong Kong, his first ever visit to China. Believe it or not, he didn't eat any Chinese food while he was there, but if you know him there's a reason for that. I have to go to work for the rest of the week but I gave him explicit written instructions on how to ride the trains to my apartment. When I walked in the door yesterday, he was standing there meeting my son and his grandson for the first time. It was a sweet moment.
He's here until Monday so I won't have much time to write. However, I can promise you that I have not forgotten what day it is today (ten years, wow!) and my Tokyo Game Show tale will be ready very, very soon. I also finished reading The Fountainhead and I feel like I need to talk about it.
Oh, but speaking of TGS, here's some more big news: my first podcast! Okay, it's not MY podcast but Alex's own DoFuss Show. We spoke over Skype this weekend about the show for two hours and he edited that together with some interviews he did and a conversation with his usual podcast partner, Darren. Unfortunately, we couldn't work out a time when all three of us could speak, but I think this is was a reasonable compromise. I do hope to talk to them again, possibly later this month when Darren comes to Japan.
You can download the MP3 at Alex's site. I haven't heard it yet but I'm looking forward to weirding myself out by listening to my own voice on my iPod. And yes, all of this is reminding me that I should try making a podcast sometime.
Labels: Alex, awkward firsts, family, friends, podcast, TGS
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, October 12, 2009
Hey, Sports Day!
Strictly speaking, today is Health and Sports Day but since the Japanese term matches the word they use for P.E. class (taiiku) I'll always think of "sports" rather than "health."
OK, I'm rambling a bit. My point is that we had a nice little three day weekend and while I didn't get up to much, I did appreciate the opportunity to sleep in - as much as any parent of a newborn can "sleep in." Having time off also meant I could watch the Yankees beat the Twins in the ALDS. Saturday's* game was a thriller, as extra-inning affairs always are, but today's game was even more fun. I couldn't believe Carl Pavano actually pitched a good game and I almost felt like he didn't deserve to lose. Then I remembered he was Carl Pavano and that made it a lot easier to see that big "L" next to his name.
With three days off I should have found time to write, but instead I used my free time to progress deeper in Batman: Arkham Asylum. The game is fantastic but so many people have written about how fantastic it is, I feel like I should probably write about what I don't like for the sake of variety. It might actually be more fun that way.
I'm hoping to get more writing done soon (especially concerning the tale of TGS which is long overdue) but I might not have much time ahead of me. My father is actually in Hong Kong right now and he's landing in Japan tomorrow for a week. He's come to see his grandson...and maybe his son too. So I anticipate a sudden drop in leisure time, even though seeing my father is a rare treat these days.
You can definitely expect something on Thursday though, if you catch my drift. I shouldn't say anything more, I'm not supposed to talk about it...
*Friday night in New York = Saturday morning in Japan. I live in the future, never forget that.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
OK, I'm rambling a bit. My point is that we had a nice little three day weekend and while I didn't get up to much, I did appreciate the opportunity to sleep in - as much as any parent of a newborn can "sleep in." Having time off also meant I could watch the Yankees beat the Twins in the ALDS. Saturday's* game was a thriller, as extra-inning affairs always are, but today's game was even more fun. I couldn't believe Carl Pavano actually pitched a good game and I almost felt like he didn't deserve to lose. Then I remembered he was Carl Pavano and that made it a lot easier to see that big "L" next to his name.
With three days off I should have found time to write, but instead I used my free time to progress deeper in Batman: Arkham Asylum. The game is fantastic but so many people have written about how fantastic it is, I feel like I should probably write about what I don't like for the sake of variety. It might actually be more fun that way.
I'm hoping to get more writing done soon (especially concerning the tale of TGS which is long overdue) but I might not have much time ahead of me. My father is actually in Hong Kong right now and he's landing in Japan tomorrow for a week. He's come to see his grandson...and maybe his son too. So I anticipate a sudden drop in leisure time, even though seeing my father is a rare treat these days.
You can definitely expect something on Thursday though, if you catch my drift. I shouldn't say anything more, I'm not supposed to talk about it...
*Friday night in New York = Saturday morning in Japan. I live in the future, never forget that.
Labels: baseball, Batman, family, video games, Yankees
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, October 05, 2009
Go Stretching Time
October 5th is the fortieth anniversary of Monty Python's Flying Circus and while there's not much else I have to say about that, I'll be damned if I didn't acknowledge that right away because I love Monty Python. It's a shame that Graham Chapman died twenty years ago (almost to the day, by the way) because he seems to have taken the rest of the group with him. Oh sure, they've all kept busy with individual pursuits over the years, but the remaining five members have never found time to work together since.
And now for something completely different.
While riding the train home from Osaka yesterday afternoon I got a surprise glimpse into the Japanese psyche, or at least that of my wife. The three of us went to the city for some errands, including the purchase of a new rice cooker. Did you know some of those things run for over $1000? Not just the big ones either, these were ordinary kitchen-sized models. What on Earth can those machines do that justify that kind of a price tag?
But I digress...we were heading home with our less-than-$100 rice cooker when Go started getting fussy. We knew it was a combination of multiple needs: he hadn't been fed or changed in a couple hours and he was overdue for a nap. We took turns holding him and trying to comfort him, but he wanted what he wanted and he wasn't interested in our offerings of love and affection. We just had to get him home so he'd relax.
Mako surprised the hell out of me when she said we should get off at the next station and tend to Go. I asked if she knew of a changing table or something but that wasn't the plan. She just wanted to take him off of the train because she felt bad about inconveniencing the other passengers. While I shared her compassion for the others, I also knew that the best way to make Go happy was to get home as quickly as possible. I tried to argue that we should just stay the course (we were five stops and about fifteen minutes from home) but Mako insisted.
We got off the train and tried to calm Go down with an offering of tea and lots of bouncing/swinging/attention. It didn't work and he continued to cry on and off while we stood on the platform. When the next train arrived ten minutes later, we had no choice but to get on and he kept on crying. Mako looked at me like she was mortified but I tried to reassure her. It's not like we were dragging the baby out into the world here, we were heading home. I felt bad that he was noisy but I also knew we were doing everything we could to quiet him down. It was out of our hands - shō ga nai as the Japanese would say.
When we got to our town and prepared to change trains for the last few minutes of our trip, Mako against suggested we leave to tend to Go before riding the train home. This time I insisted that she stop bending over backwards for strangers. We were a two-minute ride from home; the other passengers could bear a crying infant for two goddamn minutes. She relented, he cried, but we made it home and took care of everything.
In the end, her embarrassed retreat from the train meant that it took an extra twenty minutes to get home and Go cried for most of that. I know it didn't do him any harm in the long run but what good did it do to anyone? One train carload of people were spared a few minutes of Go's wailing in favor of the unfortunate bunch of people on the next train. No one gained a thing by delaying the inevitable, least of all us.
The Japanese have a catch-all word to cover being a nuisance or a bother to others: meiwaku. When it comes to public transportation, there are plenty of signs and warnings to passengers to not meiwaku those around them, usually by showing restraint (enryo). I'm sure both of these words were in the forefront of Mako's mind yesterday and I sympathize with her, but there are times when meiwaku is not a sin. If my boss calls while I'm on the train, I don't enryo I just answer the phone and try to be quick about it.
The same rules apply to a cranky Go: he is most definitely meiwaku but I would never choose to enryo at the expense of my baby. Indeed, that's a time for everyone to simply persevere (gaman) and endure a little noise.
I certainly hope it doesn't cause a problem for Mako when Go starts crying on the plane in December. He is guaranteed to meiwaku during that long flight and there certainly won't be anyplace to get out and wait for him to stop. Then again, airplanes have changing tables and the means to feed him at any time. I hope that's enough.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
And now for something completely different.
While riding the train home from Osaka yesterday afternoon I got a surprise glimpse into the Japanese psyche, or at least that of my wife. The three of us went to the city for some errands, including the purchase of a new rice cooker. Did you know some of those things run for over $1000? Not just the big ones either, these were ordinary kitchen-sized models. What on Earth can those machines do that justify that kind of a price tag?
But I digress...we were heading home with our less-than-$100 rice cooker when Go started getting fussy. We knew it was a combination of multiple needs: he hadn't been fed or changed in a couple hours and he was overdue for a nap. We took turns holding him and trying to comfort him, but he wanted what he wanted and he wasn't interested in our offerings of love and affection. We just had to get him home so he'd relax.
Mako surprised the hell out of me when she said we should get off at the next station and tend to Go. I asked if she knew of a changing table or something but that wasn't the plan. She just wanted to take him off of the train because she felt bad about inconveniencing the other passengers. While I shared her compassion for the others, I also knew that the best way to make Go happy was to get home as quickly as possible. I tried to argue that we should just stay the course (we were five stops and about fifteen minutes from home) but Mako insisted.
We got off the train and tried to calm Go down with an offering of tea and lots of bouncing/swinging/attention. It didn't work and he continued to cry on and off while we stood on the platform. When the next train arrived ten minutes later, we had no choice but to get on and he kept on crying. Mako looked at me like she was mortified but I tried to reassure her. It's not like we were dragging the baby out into the world here, we were heading home. I felt bad that he was noisy but I also knew we were doing everything we could to quiet him down. It was out of our hands - shō ga nai as the Japanese would say.
When we got to our town and prepared to change trains for the last few minutes of our trip, Mako against suggested we leave to tend to Go before riding the train home. This time I insisted that she stop bending over backwards for strangers. We were a two-minute ride from home; the other passengers could bear a crying infant for two goddamn minutes. She relented, he cried, but we made it home and took care of everything.
In the end, her embarrassed retreat from the train meant that it took an extra twenty minutes to get home and Go cried for most of that. I know it didn't do him any harm in the long run but what good did it do to anyone? One train carload of people were spared a few minutes of Go's wailing in favor of the unfortunate bunch of people on the next train. No one gained a thing by delaying the inevitable, least of all us.
The Japanese have a catch-all word to cover being a nuisance or a bother to others: meiwaku. When it comes to public transportation, there are plenty of signs and warnings to passengers to not meiwaku those around them, usually by showing restraint (enryo). I'm sure both of these words were in the forefront of Mako's mind yesterday and I sympathize with her, but there are times when meiwaku is not a sin. If my boss calls while I'm on the train, I don't enryo I just answer the phone and try to be quick about it.
The same rules apply to a cranky Go: he is most definitely meiwaku but I would never choose to enryo at the expense of my baby. Indeed, that's a time for everyone to simply persevere (gaman) and endure a little noise.
I certainly hope it doesn't cause a problem for Mako when Go starts crying on the plane in December. He is guaranteed to meiwaku during that long flight and there certainly won't be anyplace to get out and wait for him to stop. Then again, airplanes have changing tables and the means to feed him at any time. I hope that's enough.
Labels: family, Japan, Monty Python, number one son
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Saturday, October 03, 2009
And The Kids Just Keep On Comin'
So many babies, so little time...
Oh, wait, you didn't think...Mako's not pregnant again, don't be silly! It's way too soon for us to start thinking about another child, certainly not while our first is completely dependent on us.
No, the latest baby is our second nephew and the fourth grandchild for Mako's parents. Her brother and his wife just had their first child a few hours ago. They live in the Tokyo area so we don't see them very often. I met them for the first time at our wedding two years ago and I've seen him only one time since then.
The new baby actually tipped the scales at 3.5kg, a bit bigger than Go, but I'm pretty sure he was late so it doesn't count. There's no word on a name yet, but the big news is the baby's last name. Mako and her sister both have children, but those kids have shiny new last names. Mako's brother still has the family name so this boy is the first grandchild to continue the line. I'm no sociologist but I'm guessing this will be a big deal to Mako's parents.
I don't see an opportunity to meet the new baby anytime soon as neither we nor they are ready to travel from Kansai to Tokyo or vice versa. Maybe in 2010 we can organize a family gathering and get all these rascals into one room somewhere.
In the meantime, the three of us are just here, doing what we always do. Tokyo stories should be ready next week, as my TGS reporting for Wired is almost finished. I'll leave you with this picture we took yesterday. It has been cropped to spare you the fullness of my bare chest. You're welcome.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Oh, wait, you didn't think...Mako's not pregnant again, don't be silly! It's way too soon for us to start thinking about another child, certainly not while our first is completely dependent on us.
No, the latest baby is our second nephew and the fourth grandchild for Mako's parents. Her brother and his wife just had their first child a few hours ago. They live in the Tokyo area so we don't see them very often. I met them for the first time at our wedding two years ago and I've seen him only one time since then.
The new baby actually tipped the scales at 3.5kg, a bit bigger than Go, but I'm pretty sure he was late so it doesn't count. There's no word on a name yet, but the big news is the baby's last name. Mako and her sister both have children, but those kids have shiny new last names. Mako's brother still has the family name so this boy is the first grandchild to continue the line. I'm no sociologist but I'm guessing this will be a big deal to Mako's parents.
I don't see an opportunity to meet the new baby anytime soon as neither we nor they are ready to travel from Kansai to Tokyo or vice versa. Maybe in 2010 we can organize a family gathering and get all these rascals into one room somewhere.
In the meantime, the three of us are just here, doing what we always do. Tokyo stories should be ready next week, as my TGS reporting for Wired is almost finished. I'll leave you with this picture we took yesterday. It has been cropped to spare you the fullness of my bare chest. You're welcome.
Labels: family, number one son
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, September 21, 2009
What, Me Pack?
I'm flying to Tokyo tomorrow for six days and five nights. I've got a dozen things I should be doing tonight, the most important of which is packing. But why pack when I can write for my blog and procrastinate?
There was a reason I didn't prepare much over the weekend. We spent Saturday with Mako's parents, doing some shopping and simple errands. I borrowed their fax machine to handle some paperwork associated with my new job. I had never sent an international fax before and was generally unfamiliar with international calling rules in Japan, but everything seemed to work out. Hopefully they won't get a massive bill next month because I inadvertently entered them into a new calling plan or anything.
Saturday also happened to be our second/fourth anniversary but, sadly, we couldn't really have dinner or do anything as a couple. I would say last year's post is worth reading if you like to look backwards. I certainly never would have guessed that by our next anniversary, we'd have a baby. I look forward to telling him about how we met someday. Maybe I can use this blog to put it all in perspective for him.
Sunday was another undokai or "sports day" which I attended at the same school I went to last year. The big difference (and I mean big) was that last year's festivities were postponed for rain and this year they went off as planned on a Sunday. This meant the community events occurred and a full audience was on hand for it all.
The entire spectacle was magnified thrice over. Last year I speculated that I only saw half of a show because so many events were cut. The event I saw on Sunday was clearly more than just a sum of its parts. The community members were organized into teams designated by their neighborhood. Not only were mothers and fathers in attendance, but so were grandparents and siblings of all ages. I saw scores of former students there, and since I've only been here for two years that meant there were probably dozens more that I simply didn't recognize.
With so many people on hand, the energy level was through the roof. Lots of people fell down during the (many) relay races because they were pushing themselves so damn hard. Nobody got hurt and nobody seemed to mind when they tripped over a fallen competitor. People were obviously trying to win but there wasn't any sense of failure for those who lost. Then again, when all of these events are rehearsed and rehearsed so many times in the preceding weeks, I suppose it must feel more like a show than a competition. Do the members of the Washington Generals ever feel bad about losing to the Globetrotters every single time? Of course not.
I was asked to perform on the microphone again this year, only this time I had to share time with two adult announcers who were clearly going for a "conversational" approach to announcing. I could only talk when they weren't talking, but when I did I tried to do a little play-by-play for fun. People said I did a great job and I can only assume they weren't just trying to spare my feelings.
Today turned into a rather busy day because I needed to go shopping. Chris Kohler informed me that the press room at TGS has very few computers but there is is free wifi internet for all. The problem there is that my laptop doesn't have a wifi adapter. I had always thought about buying one but now I suddenly needed one. Second problem: buying computer stuff in Japan is hard because a lot of software won't work in foreign language versions of Windows.
Mako came up with a bold solution: buy a netbook. Normally she's the one pushing me to spend less money but this time she was suggesting I spend $400-500 on a new PC rather than $50 on a wireless card. Her reasoning was sound though, not that I needed much convincing to buy a new toy. I often lug my laptop to work whenever I know I'll have time to write between classes. It's not a particularly light machine, the battery is completely dead and I often encounter schedule changes that make me wish I had/hadn't brought my computer to school.
The netbook both solves my TGS reporting dilemma and will give me a quick and lightweight alternative to bringing my main computer out into the sticks every week. Starting next week I'll be able to bring the netbook with me everyday, writing whenever the opportunity presents itself. I'll still have to upload stuff when I get home (unless I discover the schools have free wifi - fat chance) but in the long run, this means less lugging and more typing. This is a very good thing.
With that, I'll bid you farewell from Osaka (er, the Osaka suburbs anyway). Tomorrow I go to the airport. I can't predict whether there will be time to blog during my trip. There's always time for Twitter, of course, which is connected to my Facebook page.
In the meantime, I would ask you to please, please, please follow the TGS 2009 coverage at Wired Game|Life and keep an eye on those bylines. My name will be there at some point very soon!
つづく...(Click here to read more)
There was a reason I didn't prepare much over the weekend. We spent Saturday with Mako's parents, doing some shopping and simple errands. I borrowed their fax machine to handle some paperwork associated with my new job. I had never sent an international fax before and was generally unfamiliar with international calling rules in Japan, but everything seemed to work out. Hopefully they won't get a massive bill next month because I inadvertently entered them into a new calling plan or anything.
Saturday also happened to be our second/fourth anniversary but, sadly, we couldn't really have dinner or do anything as a couple. I would say last year's post is worth reading if you like to look backwards. I certainly never would have guessed that by our next anniversary, we'd have a baby. I look forward to telling him about how we met someday. Maybe I can use this blog to put it all in perspective for him.
Sunday was another undokai or "sports day" which I attended at the same school I went to last year. The big difference (and I mean big) was that last year's festivities were postponed for rain and this year they went off as planned on a Sunday. This meant the community events occurred and a full audience was on hand for it all.
The entire spectacle was magnified thrice over. Last year I speculated that I only saw half of a show because so many events were cut. The event I saw on Sunday was clearly more than just a sum of its parts. The community members were organized into teams designated by their neighborhood. Not only were mothers and fathers in attendance, but so were grandparents and siblings of all ages. I saw scores of former students there, and since I've only been here for two years that meant there were probably dozens more that I simply didn't recognize.
With so many people on hand, the energy level was through the roof. Lots of people fell down during the (many) relay races because they were pushing themselves so damn hard. Nobody got hurt and nobody seemed to mind when they tripped over a fallen competitor. People were obviously trying to win but there wasn't any sense of failure for those who lost. Then again, when all of these events are rehearsed and rehearsed so many times in the preceding weeks, I suppose it must feel more like a show than a competition. Do the members of the Washington Generals ever feel bad about losing to the Globetrotters every single time? Of course not.
I was asked to perform on the microphone again this year, only this time I had to share time with two adult announcers who were clearly going for a "conversational" approach to announcing. I could only talk when they weren't talking, but when I did I tried to do a little play-by-play for fun. People said I did a great job and I can only assume they weren't just trying to spare my feelings.
Today turned into a rather busy day because I needed to go shopping. Chris Kohler informed me that the press room at TGS has very few computers but there is is free wifi internet for all. The problem there is that my laptop doesn't have a wifi adapter. I had always thought about buying one but now I suddenly needed one. Second problem: buying computer stuff in Japan is hard because a lot of software won't work in foreign language versions of Windows.
Mako came up with a bold solution: buy a netbook. Normally she's the one pushing me to spend less money but this time she was suggesting I spend $400-500 on a new PC rather than $50 on a wireless card. Her reasoning was sound though, not that I needed much convincing to buy a new toy. I often lug my laptop to work whenever I know I'll have time to write between classes. It's not a particularly light machine, the battery is completely dead and I often encounter schedule changes that make me wish I had/hadn't brought my computer to school.
The netbook both solves my TGS reporting dilemma and will give me a quick and lightweight alternative to bringing my main computer out into the sticks every week. Starting next week I'll be able to bring the netbook with me everyday, writing whenever the opportunity presents itself. I'll still have to upload stuff when I get home (unless I discover the schools have free wifi - fat chance) but in the long run, this means less lugging and more typing. This is a very good thing.
With that, I'll bid you farewell from Osaka (er, the Osaka suburbs anyway). Tomorrow I go to the airport. I can't predict whether there will be time to blog during my trip. There's always time for Twitter, of course, which is connected to my Facebook page.
In the meantime, I would ask you to please, please, please follow the TGS 2009 coverage at Wired Game|Life and keep an eye on those bylines. My name will be there at some point very soon!
Labels: anniversary, family, Japan, TGS, undokai, Wired, writing
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Sunday, September 06, 2009
Jet Baby
It is hot. Damn hot. Thick-of-August hot, despite it being September. How hot is it? I actually took a second shower today to rinse off the sweat after we went shopping. I didn't have to do that all summer long...until today.
I shouted this on my Twitter feed, but in case you missed it, big travel plans are afoot. We're coming back to New York in December and we're bringing Go with us. It's high time everyone else gets a chance to meet him.
Am I nervous about taking a six-month old on an international plane flight? Of course. For my whole life, I was one of those people who glowered at crying babies and their surely-negligent parents whenever I was trapped with them on a bus, plane or wherever. Now I have to be the parent whose kid may start screaming for no reason.
On the plus side, because we're flying a Japanese airline, I know we can count on superb service while we're on the plane. They've certainly starting things off right by assigning us much better seats after we phoned them and told them about the baby. Not only do we get a bassinet, but when we look at our seat selection screen, my little icon is holding an infant icon in its lap. That's just too cute.
We're still debating about whether or not to travel further inside the US while we have the chance. Mako isn't big on cold weather, so visiting my mother in Florida is a very real possibility. It would certainly save us the cost of staying in a New York hotel for a few nights, and given the time of year, that's a whole lot of money.
However it turns out, we'll definitely be in New York in a mere three months. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone but I'm also excited that I get to skip over the somberness of Japanese New Year's. It's going to be 2010, dammit, there should be a party. This trip ensures I'll be attending that party in my favorite place on Earth, hopefully alongside some of my favorite people.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I shouted this on my Twitter feed, but in case you missed it, big travel plans are afoot. We're coming back to New York in December and we're bringing Go with us. It's high time everyone else gets a chance to meet him.
Am I nervous about taking a six-month old on an international plane flight? Of course. For my whole life, I was one of those people who glowered at crying babies and their surely-negligent parents whenever I was trapped with them on a bus, plane or wherever. Now I have to be the parent whose kid may start screaming for no reason.
On the plus side, because we're flying a Japanese airline, I know we can count on superb service while we're on the plane. They've certainly starting things off right by assigning us much better seats after we phoned them and told them about the baby. Not only do we get a bassinet, but when we look at our seat selection screen, my little icon is holding an infant icon in its lap. That's just too cute.
We're still debating about whether or not to travel further inside the US while we have the chance. Mako isn't big on cold weather, so visiting my mother in Florida is a very real possibility. It would certainly save us the cost of staying in a New York hotel for a few nights, and given the time of year, that's a whole lot of money.
However it turns out, we'll definitely be in New York in a mere three months. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone but I'm also excited that I get to skip over the somberness of Japanese New Year's. It's going to be 2010, dammit, there should be a party. This trip ensures I'll be attending that party in my favorite place on Earth, hopefully alongside some of my favorite people.
Labels: family, number one son
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, August 31, 2009
Bye Bye August
I am so glad this month is over. I don't normally point fingers at or curse arbitrary time designations but this August was a particularly nasty one. I won't be sorry to see it end.
I say this because the arrival of my mystery illness coincided almost perfectly with the start of this month and now that it's over, I am feeling much better. This should have been a light month for me, a period where I could write or play games or do whatever I wanted because I wasn't needed much at work. Instead, I spent a lot of my time feeling like crap, wrote very little and didn't do much of anything.
I certainly didn't have the energy to properly welcome my visiting family or escort the new JET in my area around. Everyone says they don't blame me, but I blame me because my absence no doubt put more pressure on everyone around me who doesn't speak Japanese. So let me say it one more time for all to hear: I'm sorry I wasn't stronger.
But let's move on, shall we? The weather and my condition have improved dramatically over this final week of August. I have to assume those facts are related, because nothing I received from any of the doctors I visited could have "cured" me. Perhaps it was psychosomatic, perhaps it was a passing bug or virus, or perhaps it was just something I ate. It's over now and I'm glad to be rid of it.
Classes have resumed at school and I'm picking up where I left off as best I can. Some students listen, some students don't. The same goes for the teachers I have to work with: some listen, some don't. Most of the schools have done a pretty good job of being prepared to discuss and start classes on the very first day I am available to teach (with this morning being a notable but ultimately predictable exception).
The best news out of all of this is that Go remained happy and healthy throughout the month, so whatever the hell happened to me it didn't have any visible effect on him. I leave you with this photo of him as evidence that my son is, objectively speaking, the most adorable baby of all time.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I say this because the arrival of my mystery illness coincided almost perfectly with the start of this month and now that it's over, I am feeling much better. This should have been a light month for me, a period where I could write or play games or do whatever I wanted because I wasn't needed much at work. Instead, I spent a lot of my time feeling like crap, wrote very little and didn't do much of anything.
I certainly didn't have the energy to properly welcome my visiting family or escort the new JET in my area around. Everyone says they don't blame me, but I blame me because my absence no doubt put more pressure on everyone around me who doesn't speak Japanese. So let me say it one more time for all to hear: I'm sorry I wasn't stronger.
But let's move on, shall we? The weather and my condition have improved dramatically over this final week of August. I have to assume those facts are related, because nothing I received from any of the doctors I visited could have "cured" me. Perhaps it was psychosomatic, perhaps it was a passing bug or virus, or perhaps it was just something I ate. It's over now and I'm glad to be rid of it.
Classes have resumed at school and I'm picking up where I left off as best I can. Some students listen, some students don't. The same goes for the teachers I have to work with: some listen, some don't. Most of the schools have done a pretty good job of being prepared to discuss and start classes on the very first day I am available to teach (with this morning being a notable but ultimately predictable exception).
The best news out of all of this is that Go remained happy and healthy throughout the month, so whatever the hell happened to me it didn't have any visible effect on him. I leave you with this photo of him as evidence that my son is, objectively speaking, the most adorable baby of all time.
Labels: family, frustration, Japan, JET, number one son, poor health, teaching
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Friday, August 21, 2009
An Unpleasant August
If there's one thing I've learned from five years of blogging, it's that a tiny post is better than no post and trying to save yourself for a mega-post is a really stupid idea.
I'm still on vacation and I'm still "sick," although I put that word in quotes because my symptoms of late have been limited to nuisance-levels. No fevers for the past week, no uncontrollable bathroom urges, and hardly any discomfort save for the general sense of anxiety I have over my lingering illness.
I did see a doctor this week (a specialist in fact) in the hopes of getting something other than the usual symptom-focused medication my local clinic was dispensing. However, he seemed far more concerned with my propensity for drinking cold liquids than my recent fevers. This idea that drinks can make your stomach "cold" is apparently a big thing in Japan, even though I've never heard of it. I'm no doctor of course, but it seems pretty fishy to me to blame my love of ice-cold water for my recent intestinal distress. I pour a lot of chilled liquids down my throat every year, and suddenly in the past month it's a problem? I don't buy that.
My family has come and gone. They had a great time, or so they claimed, and they certainly got to meet Go so they seemed pretty happy about the whole trip. I would have liked to have spent more time with them (considering I was on vacation and all) but a flare up of symptoms late last week kept me out of action for a day or two. They still came to see me and the baby but I missed a chance to go sightseeing with them, which is unfortunate. Here's hoping I get to see them and everyone else back in New York before the year is out.
Speaking of international flights, we took Go in to the consulate this morning to file the necessary papers to get him "on the grid," so to speak. In a few weeks he'll have his own Social Security number and passport! It remains to be seen whether he'll be ready to fly this year or not, but from a paperwork standpoint he should be all set by October.
That's all the news I've got for you right now. The better I feel, the more time I should have to write, although I feel like a tool because summer is almost over and I barely got anything new on the blog this month. In a way my hands were tied but that doesn't mean I'm happy about it.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I'm still on vacation and I'm still "sick," although I put that word in quotes because my symptoms of late have been limited to nuisance-levels. No fevers for the past week, no uncontrollable bathroom urges, and hardly any discomfort save for the general sense of anxiety I have over my lingering illness.
I did see a doctor this week (a specialist in fact) in the hopes of getting something other than the usual symptom-focused medication my local clinic was dispensing. However, he seemed far more concerned with my propensity for drinking cold liquids than my recent fevers. This idea that drinks can make your stomach "cold" is apparently a big thing in Japan, even though I've never heard of it. I'm no doctor of course, but it seems pretty fishy to me to blame my love of ice-cold water for my recent intestinal distress. I pour a lot of chilled liquids down my throat every year, and suddenly in the past month it's a problem? I don't buy that.
My family has come and gone. They had a great time, or so they claimed, and they certainly got to meet Go so they seemed pretty happy about the whole trip. I would have liked to have spent more time with them (considering I was on vacation and all) but a flare up of symptoms late last week kept me out of action for a day or two. They still came to see me and the baby but I missed a chance to go sightseeing with them, which is unfortunate. Here's hoping I get to see them and everyone else back in New York before the year is out.
Speaking of international flights, we took Go in to the consulate this morning to file the necessary papers to get him "on the grid," so to speak. In a few weeks he'll have his own Social Security number and passport! It remains to be seen whether he'll be ready to fly this year or not, but from a paperwork standpoint he should be all set by October.
That's all the news I've got for you right now. The better I feel, the more time I should have to write, although I feel like a tool because summer is almost over and I barely got anything new on the blog this month. In a way my hands were tied but that doesn't mean I'm happy about it.
Labels: family, Japan, number one son, poor health, writing
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, August 10, 2009
The Era of Bad Feelings
Once again, I find myself using my abundance of time spent at home as an excuse for not getting any writing done. I suppose the reason I'm stuck at home is a factor at well.
In case you haven't heard, I'm still sick. I've never been great at dragging diagnoses out of doctors in English, so doing it in Japanese is next to impossible, but so far as I can tell I've got some kind of virus. My overall condition has ranged from "ok" to "unpleasant" over the past two weeks, with the lowest points being Monday, July 27 and last Thursday when I was feverish. That second fever sent me back to the doctor for a blood test. He insisted that I get some rest and that this virus should soon pass, but as I begin my third week of not feeling well I'm a little bit suspicious.
The good news is that neither Go nor Mako are showing any signs of catching whatever I've got, so it seems I am not contagious. During both of my fevers they escaped to her parents' house to avoid possible contamination and let me rest, but I must assume that they would have gotten sick by now if that was possible. Still, it is extremely uncomfortable to hold Go in my arms and try to sooth him to sleep when all I want to do is go to the bathroom or lay down.
Lest you think I've been writhing in agony for the past two weeks, I have managed to entertain myself with video games. I actually finished BioShock which was tremendously satisfying. Why I put that game off for so long, I'll never understand. It actually wasn't that long of a game to complete; it just took me two months because I insisted on exploring every corner of the city. Part of me is strongly tempted to start a new game on a higher difficulty setting so I can see what's different (and get more trophies) but realistically, I have so little time to play games I'm better off moving on to something else.
That "something else" could be the upcoming Batman: Arkham Asylum, because I felt the demo was really quite good. Sneaking up behind thugs and silently taking them down was exciting, as was the hand-to-hand parts where I just beat the snot out of three guys at the same time. My biggest concern is that the game will get repetitive since Batman can't acquire new "powers" (he doesn't really have any to being with) but the myriad of options I've had in just the demo is extremely encouraging. It turns out there are an awful lot of ways to sneak up on someone in this game, which means that there isn't just one solution to each dangerous situation. I'm just going to wait and see what people say about it before I consider buying it.
In the meantime, there will be no time for games (or writing) as my mother and sister will be arriving in Japan on Wednesday for their first meeting with Go. It will be wonderful to see them again and let them watch the baby while Mako and I relax for once. Their vacation is our vacation! I'm kidding, of course, but not about being happy to have visitors. But this is one more reason I'm not going to have much time to write, so August is looking like a pretty sparse month on the blogging front. Then again, my sister makes up 20-50% of my readership which means my posts won't be missed much.
See you soon, Salena!
つづく...(Click here to read more)
In case you haven't heard, I'm still sick. I've never been great at dragging diagnoses out of doctors in English, so doing it in Japanese is next to impossible, but so far as I can tell I've got some kind of virus. My overall condition has ranged from "ok" to "unpleasant" over the past two weeks, with the lowest points being Monday, July 27 and last Thursday when I was feverish. That second fever sent me back to the doctor for a blood test. He insisted that I get some rest and that this virus should soon pass, but as I begin my third week of not feeling well I'm a little bit suspicious.
The good news is that neither Go nor Mako are showing any signs of catching whatever I've got, so it seems I am not contagious. During both of my fevers they escaped to her parents' house to avoid possible contamination and let me rest, but I must assume that they would have gotten sick by now if that was possible. Still, it is extremely uncomfortable to hold Go in my arms and try to sooth him to sleep when all I want to do is go to the bathroom or lay down.
Lest you think I've been writhing in agony for the past two weeks, I have managed to entertain myself with video games. I actually finished BioShock which was tremendously satisfying. Why I put that game off for so long, I'll never understand. It actually wasn't that long of a game to complete; it just took me two months because I insisted on exploring every corner of the city. Part of me is strongly tempted to start a new game on a higher difficulty setting so I can see what's different (and get more trophies) but realistically, I have so little time to play games I'm better off moving on to something else.
That "something else" could be the upcoming Batman: Arkham Asylum, because I felt the demo was really quite good. Sneaking up behind thugs and silently taking them down was exciting, as was the hand-to-hand parts where I just beat the snot out of three guys at the same time. My biggest concern is that the game will get repetitive since Batman can't acquire new "powers" (he doesn't really have any to being with) but the myriad of options I've had in just the demo is extremely encouraging. It turns out there are an awful lot of ways to sneak up on someone in this game, which means that there isn't just one solution to each dangerous situation. I'm just going to wait and see what people say about it before I consider buying it.
In the meantime, there will be no time for games (or writing) as my mother and sister will be arriving in Japan on Wednesday for their first meeting with Go. It will be wonderful to see them again and let them watch the baby while Mako and I relax for once. Their vacation is our vacation! I'm kidding, of course, but not about being happy to have visitors. But this is one more reason I'm not going to have much time to write, so August is looking like a pretty sparse month on the blogging front. Then again, my sister makes up 20-50% of my readership which means my posts won't be missed much.
See you soon, Salena!
Labels: Batman, BioShock, family, number one son, poor health, video games
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, August 03, 2009
New Month, New Face (Same Old Shituation)
Oh hey, it's August! How are you doing? I didn't see you come in. Perhaps because I spent so much time in the bathroom during the last week of July?
Yeah, without getting into any detail at all, I just have to go on record as saying this past week has been craptacularly uncomfortable for me. While I'm lucky that this didn't all go down during the school year, because I was in no condition to teach classes, this was a relatively busy week as far as summer vacation goes and it wasn't easy to handle.
The fever which had me out on the couch for two days (and sent Mako and Go hiding at her parents' house for three) left without much trouble, but certain lingering symptoms continue to vex me. The medication I received on Friday had some effect but my condition has not changed, so I may need to revisit the doctor this evening to see where we go from here. I don't think there's anything serious to worry about (yet) but a week of this is about five days too long in my opinion, so I'm not going to just sit it out anymore. I must insist on active medical remedies at this point.
Why was I busy when classes and students are nowhere to be seen? Well there's a new JET coming to Hana Town and she arrived on Wednesday of this week. As both the RA for our area and (more importantly) the only other JET in Hana Town, I made it a point to be there to greet her at Shin Osaka station alongside our supervisor from the Board of Education.
The good news is she's very friendly and I'm sure that she'll do a terrific job working with the middle school students. Her California accent isn't too strong so her pronunciation is good, which is key in this job, she has experience teaching and working with children, and she seems to be so positive about everything that I bet the kids will really like her.
The bad news is that she doesn't speak Japanese, so I spent a good chunk of Wednesday, Thursday and Friday trying to translate the world around her in addition to answering her many questions about her job, this area, and Japan in general. I hope that when Japan gets weird on her (and it will, eventually) she can handle it even if I'm not there to explain what's happening. Otherwise she'll leave and we'll have to do this all over again next summer.
We haven't really talked about Internet issues or my blogging, so I'll refrain from getting into any of her details, such as her name. At this point it's unclear whether or not we may work together at all or if she'll take over the tiny mountain school as her predecessor did for me last year.
Speaking of which, that's where I am right now (or rather, when I typed this) and that's unusual because I don't normally come here during the summer. Without any public transportation to connect this school to the rest of the world, in summers past I would simply spend my time elsewhere, but for some reason they actively wanted me to show up here today. I stress "for some reason" because I've been here for two hours and no one has yet to talk any kind of school business with me at all.
In completely unrelated news, Go turns six weeks old tomorrow. I've read this is a major step in his development, so we'll see how that goes. Supposedly he'll start sleeping more, but I suspect that will take a little more effort on our parts to not respond to his every tear. He cries a lot, even when full, and rarely is he able to sleep on his own. For his sake and for ours, this needs to change.
Of course, all that can wait until after my mother and sister come through here next week. Despite my warnings that summer in Japan is nothing short of hellish, the urge to see Go has overtaken the two of them and they cannot wait to hold him in their arms. Will that urge also drive them to change his diaper and give him his bottle? Because we will happily hand over all relevant materials and sit that week out if needed. We're flexible like that.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Yeah, without getting into any detail at all, I just have to go on record as saying this past week has been craptacularly uncomfortable for me. While I'm lucky that this didn't all go down during the school year, because I was in no condition to teach classes, this was a relatively busy week as far as summer vacation goes and it wasn't easy to handle.
The fever which had me out on the couch for two days (and sent Mako and Go hiding at her parents' house for three) left without much trouble, but certain lingering symptoms continue to vex me. The medication I received on Friday had some effect but my condition has not changed, so I may need to revisit the doctor this evening to see where we go from here. I don't think there's anything serious to worry about (yet) but a week of this is about five days too long in my opinion, so I'm not going to just sit it out anymore. I must insist on active medical remedies at this point.
Why was I busy when classes and students are nowhere to be seen? Well there's a new JET coming to Hana Town and she arrived on Wednesday of this week. As both the RA for our area and (more importantly) the only other JET in Hana Town, I made it a point to be there to greet her at Shin Osaka station alongside our supervisor from the Board of Education.
The good news is she's very friendly and I'm sure that she'll do a terrific job working with the middle school students. Her California accent isn't too strong so her pronunciation is good, which is key in this job, she has experience teaching and working with children, and she seems to be so positive about everything that I bet the kids will really like her.
The bad news is that she doesn't speak Japanese, so I spent a good chunk of Wednesday, Thursday and Friday trying to translate the world around her in addition to answering her many questions about her job, this area, and Japan in general. I hope that when Japan gets weird on her (and it will, eventually) she can handle it even if I'm not there to explain what's happening. Otherwise she'll leave and we'll have to do this all over again next summer.
We haven't really talked about Internet issues or my blogging, so I'll refrain from getting into any of her details, such as her name. At this point it's unclear whether or not we may work together at all or if she'll take over the tiny mountain school as her predecessor did for me last year.
Speaking of which, that's where I am right now (or rather, when I typed this) and that's unusual because I don't normally come here during the summer. Without any public transportation to connect this school to the rest of the world, in summers past I would simply spend my time elsewhere, but for some reason they actively wanted me to show up here today. I stress "for some reason" because I've been here for two hours and no one has yet to talk any kind of school business with me at all.
In completely unrelated news, Go turns six weeks old tomorrow. I've read this is a major step in his development, so we'll see how that goes. Supposedly he'll start sleeping more, but I suspect that will take a little more effort on our parts to not respond to his every tear. He cries a lot, even when full, and rarely is he able to sleep on his own. For his sake and for ours, this needs to change.
Of course, all that can wait until after my mother and sister come through here next week. Despite my warnings that summer in Japan is nothing short of hellish, the urge to see Go has overtaken the two of them and they cannot wait to hold him in their arms. Will that urge also drive them to change his diaper and give him his bottle? Because we will happily hand over all relevant materials and sit that week out if needed. We're flexible like that.
Labels: family, JET, number one son, poor health
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Daddy's Home
Today turned out to be a very nice day. I went to work and was sent straight home because there's nothing for me to do over the summer. While I admit it was a bit of a nuisance commuting all the way there and back, I'll take the early release over an awkward day of waiting every time.
Mako was delighted to have me around all day. She says Go was also happy to see me, though at this point it's still impossible to tell whether he's happy or just making faces. Either way it was lovely to just be here and help out. Go doesn't sleep much when we put him down but he can fall asleep in our arms, so I served as a valuable distraction throughout the afternoon. Of course, when the two of them took a nap I got in some time on BioShock. This just in: that game is still awesome.
In sports news, I got to watch the Yankees win their way into first place. The team's problems are evident: their starting pitching continues to underperform and several of their stars seem to need a lot of rest these days because of their age, but this team is good. Good enough to get to the World Series? Probably not, but at this point they look like a solid Wild Card contender. Sometimes that's all it takes.
In national (as in this particular nation where I live) sports news, this year's Nagoya sumo tournament isn't going so well. Everyone I like lost today, which left me feeling sad. However, the day ended well when Hakuho, the boring Yokozuna who just beats everybody, lost as well. This means that the tournament is still wide open as we approach the final weekend. Go for it...um...anyone but Hakuho!
There was also the matter of a total eclipse this morning that was visible in Japan. Unfortunately, we weren't really in the target area and it was horribly overcast all morning, so we saw nothing in our skies. NHK did manage to give us a nice HD closeup of the phenomenon, at least once they were done having two dudes stand in a forest where it's always dark. Hey assholes, the point of an eclipse is that the sun disappears, so try hanging out someplace bright next time. I hear "next time" is twenty-six years away by the way, so there's time to find a cave or crevasse.
OK, we all know the big news today is my son. It's been a month since he was born. We didn't do anything special to commemorate the occasion, although I did snap the following picture. Enjoy!
Excuse me for not getting up. I've had a busy life.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Mako was delighted to have me around all day. She says Go was also happy to see me, though at this point it's still impossible to tell whether he's happy or just making faces. Either way it was lovely to just be here and help out. Go doesn't sleep much when we put him down but he can fall asleep in our arms, so I served as a valuable distraction throughout the afternoon. Of course, when the two of them took a nap I got in some time on BioShock. This just in: that game is still awesome.
In sports news, I got to watch the Yankees win their way into first place. The team's problems are evident: their starting pitching continues to underperform and several of their stars seem to need a lot of rest these days because of their age, but this team is good. Good enough to get to the World Series? Probably not, but at this point they look like a solid Wild Card contender. Sometimes that's all it takes.
In national (as in this particular nation where I live) sports news, this year's Nagoya sumo tournament isn't going so well. Everyone I like lost today, which left me feeling sad. However, the day ended well when Hakuho, the boring Yokozuna who just beats everybody, lost as well. This means that the tournament is still wide open as we approach the final weekend. Go for it...um...anyone but Hakuho!
There was also the matter of a total eclipse this morning that was visible in Japan. Unfortunately, we weren't really in the target area and it was horribly overcast all morning, so we saw nothing in our skies. NHK did manage to give us a nice HD closeup of the phenomenon, at least once they were done having two dudes stand in a forest where it's always dark. Hey assholes, the point of an eclipse is that the sun disappears, so try hanging out someplace bright next time. I hear "next time" is twenty-six years away by the way, so there's time to find a cave or crevasse.
OK, we all know the big news today is my son. It's been a month since he was born. We didn't do anything special to commemorate the occasion, although I did snap the following picture. Enjoy!
Excuse me for not getting up. I've had a busy life.
Labels: baseball, family, Japan, number one son, sports, sumo, teaching, Yankees
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Too Rich for my Blood?
Another food post? It's true. If I'm not eating, I'm thinking about it.
This glorious meal/hideous monstrosity (depending on your world view) was our lunch today. Mako and I are at her parents' house again, partly because it's a long weekend but mostly because they want to see the baby and we want to have people watch the baby. Especially when they watch the baby while we take a walk, go shopping, or do anything that's just the two of us for a change. Go is adorable but we still like doing stuff as a couple, after all.
But this is not about Go, it's about the pizza, which in today's case was Domino's Pizza. Mako's mom had a coupon that was burning a hole in her purse and we used it. Mako's dad wanted seafood, Mako wanted the special "Mille-feuille" cheese-filled crust and Mako's mom had no opinion whatsoever so the rest was up to me. Domino's Japan does offer traditional fare like pepperoni (they even call the pie "American Special") but since Japanese pizza is going to be weird no matter what, I try to embrace the oddities and order different stuff for the sake of being different, which is how we arrived at the disparate pie seen above.
On the left is the "Prime Seafood" package with the usual suspects: shrimp, squid, scallops, and some broccoli. No straight-up fish, no mayo and no corn. On the right is the special limited-time "Sirloin Steak" arrangement. That's grilled zucchini under the steak, and they claim to have topped the whole thing with "truffle cheese." Instead of tomato sauce, they used some kind of "steak sauce" although I barely noticed it with all the cheese I had to contend with.
Now this pizza tasted good and I was happy to eat it, but two things about this meal bothered me. First, Mako's dad started eating his own lunch after we phoned in our order. He subsequently only ate one piece of the pie and I'm not even sure if he ate the half that he insisted upon. While this did mean more for me, that struck me as kind of a dick move even without considering that the steak half was way tastier than the seafood half. Why did he take such an interest in our lunch if he already had designs on his own separate food?
The other thing that bugged me about this pie was the cost: 4700 Yen ($50 give or take). Pizza in Japan is always pricey but this was ridiculous. It was a decent sized pie that satisfied four people, but that's totally out of line. Even factoring in the 1000 Yen coupon and the free delivery it cost more than any pizza pie ever should.
And yet...I would totally order it again, because I love pizza. But you knew that.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
This glorious meal/hideous monstrosity (depending on your world view) was our lunch today. Mako and I are at her parents' house again, partly because it's a long weekend but mostly because they want to see the baby and we want to have people watch the baby. Especially when they watch the baby while we take a walk, go shopping, or do anything that's just the two of us for a change. Go is adorable but we still like doing stuff as a couple, after all.
But this is not about Go, it's about the pizza, which in today's case was Domino's Pizza. Mako's mom had a coupon that was burning a hole in her purse and we used it. Mako's dad wanted seafood, Mako wanted the special "Mille-feuille" cheese-filled crust and Mako's mom had no opinion whatsoever so the rest was up to me. Domino's Japan does offer traditional fare like pepperoni (they even call the pie "American Special") but since Japanese pizza is going to be weird no matter what, I try to embrace the oddities and order different stuff for the sake of being different, which is how we arrived at the disparate pie seen above.
On the left is the "Prime Seafood" package with the usual suspects: shrimp, squid, scallops, and some broccoli. No straight-up fish, no mayo and no corn. On the right is the special limited-time "Sirloin Steak" arrangement. That's grilled zucchini under the steak, and they claim to have topped the whole thing with "truffle cheese." Instead of tomato sauce, they used some kind of "steak sauce" although I barely noticed it with all the cheese I had to contend with.
Now this pizza tasted good and I was happy to eat it, but two things about this meal bothered me. First, Mako's dad started eating his own lunch after we phoned in our order. He subsequently only ate one piece of the pie and I'm not even sure if he ate the half that he insisted upon. While this did mean more for me, that struck me as kind of a dick move even without considering that the steak half was way tastier than the seafood half. Why did he take such an interest in our lunch if he already had designs on his own separate food?
The other thing that bugged me about this pie was the cost: 4700 Yen ($50 give or take). Pizza in Japan is always pricey but this was ridiculous. It was a decent sized pie that satisfied four people, but that's totally out of line. Even factoring in the 1000 Yen coupon and the free delivery it cost more than any pizza pie ever should.
And yet...I would totally order it again, because I love pizza. But you knew that.
Labels: family, food, Japan, pizza
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Saturday, July 04, 2009
Dependents' Day
To all my American friends (in America), I hope you enjoy your Fourth of July to the fullest. My Independence Day has been a celebration of not being independent anymore. Mako and Go have come home!
I know, I'm as surprised as you are. She called me late one night this week and asked me if I was done building the crib. I was not, and she asked me to get it ready because she wanted to bring the baby home. I thought she would spend at least one week with her parents after leaving the hospital (perhaps even two or three), but that didn't happen. What exactly did happen I'll never know, but something prompted Mako to leave their house much sooner than we had discussed.
So far, this baby thing is not going as smoothly as my research indicated it would. I was under the impression that newborns slept a lot (hence the expression "sleeping like a baby") but so far, Go doesn't sleep much. I knew he wouldn't be able to sleep through the night but I thought he would spend more of his time asleep than he does. He seems to be always hungry, which worries me that we're misreading the signs and feeding him when he doesn't want it. Are babies like goldfish? Will they consume anything that they receive to the point of detriment?
That's all I have time to say on the matter for now. Things are obviously going to change a lot and I'll have to accept that. At least I can count on finding time to write at work as my responsibilities decrease, because my responsibilities at home took a massive upturn today. Still, I used the word "celebrate" for a reason: I'm very happy Mako is home and that our son is here with us. This is going to be hard work but we knew that. I only wish I knew if things got easier or harder from here - the books seem to conflict on that point!
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I know, I'm as surprised as you are. She called me late one night this week and asked me if I was done building the crib. I was not, and she asked me to get it ready because she wanted to bring the baby home. I thought she would spend at least one week with her parents after leaving the hospital (perhaps even two or three), but that didn't happen. What exactly did happen I'll never know, but something prompted Mako to leave their house much sooner than we had discussed.
So far, this baby thing is not going as smoothly as my research indicated it would. I was under the impression that newborns slept a lot (hence the expression "sleeping like a baby") but so far, Go doesn't sleep much. I knew he wouldn't be able to sleep through the night but I thought he would spend more of his time asleep than he does. He seems to be always hungry, which worries me that we're misreading the signs and feeding him when he doesn't want it. Are babies like goldfish? Will they consume anything that they receive to the point of detriment?
That's all I have time to say on the matter for now. Things are obviously going to change a lot and I'll have to accept that. At least I can count on finding time to write at work as my responsibilities decrease, because my responsibilities at home took a massive upturn today. Still, I used the word "celebrate" for a reason: I'm very happy Mako is home and that our son is here with us. This is going to be hard work but we knew that. I only wish I knew if things got easier or harder from here - the books seem to conflict on that point!
Labels: family, number one son
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Japan, baby, sleepy...I've written this one before, haven't I?
I've been in and out of work over the last week, missing time to visit Mako and the baby, particularly to be there when they checked out yesterday morning. Can't say it's any easier to get myself in the mood to teach these days, but at this point I credit the unpleasant weather and the fact that this semester is practically over. The fact that I missed a couple days here and there adds to the feeling that we're all just killing time in English class until summer vacation starts. Of course, the fact that half of my classes were canceled today so the kids could go swimming is another reminder that what I do isn't all that important.
I know my attitudes towards this job (and this country) are cyclical. It just so happens that so far, this year's cycles have been warped by dealing with a difficult pregnancy and then the birth itself which was ill-timed to say the least. I'm confident that once the summer has passed, giving me ample time to adjust to the serious life changes that are in store for me, I'll be eager to get back to work when the new semester starts (in August, damn it, thanks to that week off we took for the "new flu" panic).
Speaking of the baby, since that's all everyone wants to know about lately, he is with Mako at her parents' house and doing what babies do: consume, excrete, and occasionally sleep. He's still the most adorable baby I've ever seen, but I guess there's an obvious bias there. For those curious, yes, I have held him and I've given him a bottle a couple of times, but I have yet to try my hand at the infamous diaper duty. Don't worry, I won't leave Mako hanging in that department; I'm no monster, I'm merely squeemish.
Augh, it's past midnight and I'm still up. This kind of behavior can wait for the baby to arrive. He's nowhere near the point where he sleeps through the night, according to Mako, so I should really try harder to get my sleep while I can.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I know my attitudes towards this job (and this country) are cyclical. It just so happens that so far, this year's cycles have been warped by dealing with a difficult pregnancy and then the birth itself which was ill-timed to say the least. I'm confident that once the summer has passed, giving me ample time to adjust to the serious life changes that are in store for me, I'll be eager to get back to work when the new semester starts (in August, damn it, thanks to that week off we took for the "new flu" panic).
Speaking of the baby, since that's all everyone wants to know about lately, he is with Mako at her parents' house and doing what babies do: consume, excrete, and occasionally sleep. He's still the most adorable baby I've ever seen, but I guess there's an obvious bias there. For those curious, yes, I have held him and I've given him a bottle a couple of times, but I have yet to try my hand at the infamous diaper duty. Don't worry, I won't leave Mako hanging in that department; I'm no monster, I'm merely squeemish.
Augh, it's past midnight and I'm still up. This kind of behavior can wait for the baby to arrive. He's nowhere near the point where he sleeps through the night, according to Mako, so I should really try harder to get my sleep while I can.
Labels: family, Japan, number one son, teaching
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Progeny, Thy Name is...
So I've got this baby to take care of now. What am I going to call it?
Quick note: you might have missed it, but I posted the full story of my son's birth right here. I wanted the post to be dated on his birthday (which is when I started writing it, honestly) but then when I made this quickie post to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of Batman, the other post kind of slipped down on the page a bit and my usual auto-notification system ignored it. So if you didn't already, please go back and read about our day-long delivery experience. Or you can tell me what you think of Batman, that's cool too.
What was I talking about? Oh right, the baby. My inbox and Facebook have been overflowing with messages about the baby. First, let me thank everyone who wrote in to congratulate us. I really appreciate all the love and I know Mako does to. She's still in the hospital right now but whenever I see her, she asks about what information I have shared with my family and friends. Unfortunately, she's a bit sensitive about her appearance right now, so she doesn't want me to share any photos with her in them. In fact, she doesn't even want to see them on my phone! The first picture I chose to add to my mobile phone's background was a shot of her holding the baby because I felt it was a beautiful picture of two people I love. When she spotted it, she immediately told me to change it lest someone else see her face au natural.
I am hoping to get a nice shot of our new family soon, but I presume it will have to wait until she is discharged so she can put on her makeup. No kidding: both Mako and her mother were really worried on Sunday because they left the house without going through their usual beauty routines. Ladies, if you're reading this, believe me when I tell you that any human being who is seriously concerned you are not wearing makeup is a douchebag - especially if you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby!
For those of you clamoring for more baby details, here they are. My son was born on June 22nd at 2:33 AM. At the time, he was 1' 8" and weighed 7 lbs 7 oz. These seem to be above-average numbers in Japan; he is noticeably larger than the other babies I see in the maternity ward. So far, his appearance is more Asian than Caucasian. His hair color, eye color, eye shape and skin tone all resemble his mother's more than my own. However, we all agree that facially, he looks like me in some way, particularly the eyes and nose. Watching these features develop over time will be very exciting.
One weird thing I must talk about are his hands. When I first saw him after the nurses toweled him off, his hands were pale, wrinkled and the fingernails were a dark crimson. In other words, he had what I would call "wizard hands." Subsequent washing and nail trimming has made them more human than magic-user, but they still seem quite wrinkled. Mako thinks they look like my hands even though he has her nails. No one has laid claim to his feet yet.
Of course, the big question everyone wants to know is "what is the baby's name?" While I was coy about this for a long time, the fact is we picked two names (one male, one female) months ago. Once we learned the gender we threw out the girl's name and have been using his name ever since. Some late-term kicking made me jokingly refer to him as "Bruce Lee Feit" for a stretch, something Mako immediately mock-embraced and then latched onto for a while, but otherwise all that time I pretended we were still deciding, we weren't. I just wanted to say the baby's name to his face before telling other people.
Now that he's heard it, I can tell you all my son's name is...
GO
In Japanese, that's written with the following character:
...which means "great," "powerful" or as I like to think of it, "awesome." It also represents Australia in certain contexts, which is pretty random. I guess we'll have to take a trip there someday.
(If you just want to learn more about this character, including seeing a list of words that use it, you can visit this page for more information)
It took us a long time to settle on GO. Mako, much to my surprise, was more interested in Western sounding names than I was. As I previously mentioned, she was quite fond of "DJ" (as in "Daniel Junior") and it took some stern refusals on my part to force her to drop it. Meanwhile, I wanted a Japanese name from the start but Mako shot down all of my ideas as being too old-fashioned or because she felt they were inspired by anime or movies. I still maintain Kenshiro Feit would be an incredible name for a child but she disagreed. Vehemently.
In the end, GO satisfied us both and it had the added benefit of being instantly recognizable to both English and Japanese speakers. Japanese doesn't use a lot of vowel sounds but the way certain names are romanized, it can be confusing if you are unfamiliar with the language. Cool names like Ryu and Iori would only confuse my American family and friends, and certain English-derived Japanese names would be romanized in odd ways (i.e. Rei/Ray or Tomu/Tom) GO is simple, straightforward and if I may say so, dynamic.
(Strictly speaking, GO is a long "o" which can be romanized as Gou, Goh or Gô. But much like Tokyo is never written as Toukyou, GO is just going to be GO in my book)
For those curious parties, there will be no middle name or any other artificial names recorded for my son. Middle names are sources of endless confusion in Japan because the custom is not well understood. I can't tell you how many times I've been questioned or forced to rewrite application forms because I neglected to include my middle name or I did so and the clerk misinterpreted it. No, his name is GO. That's that.
For those curious, GO is a Cancer in the West and a Ox/Bull in the East, the latter being particularly popular in Japan. Don't feel pressure to pay attention to either though. I view the whole thing as a curiosity myself, but I have the luxury of being a Scorpion AND a Dragon which is just plain cool. GO shares a birthday with some notable movie-types, such as Meryl Streep, Hong Kong actor/director Stephen Chow and...Bruce Campbell???
Is it too late to name him Bruce?
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Quick note: you might have missed it, but I posted the full story of my son's birth right here. I wanted the post to be dated on his birthday (which is when I started writing it, honestly) but then when I made this quickie post to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of Batman, the other post kind of slipped down on the page a bit and my usual auto-notification system ignored it. So if you didn't already, please go back and read about our day-long delivery experience. Or you can tell me what you think of Batman, that's cool too.
What was I talking about? Oh right, the baby. My inbox and Facebook have been overflowing with messages about the baby. First, let me thank everyone who wrote in to congratulate us. I really appreciate all the love and I know Mako does to. She's still in the hospital right now but whenever I see her, she asks about what information I have shared with my family and friends. Unfortunately, she's a bit sensitive about her appearance right now, so she doesn't want me to share any photos with her in them. In fact, she doesn't even want to see them on my phone! The first picture I chose to add to my mobile phone's background was a shot of her holding the baby because I felt it was a beautiful picture of two people I love. When she spotted it, she immediately told me to change it lest someone else see her face au natural.
I am hoping to get a nice shot of our new family soon, but I presume it will have to wait until she is discharged so she can put on her makeup. No kidding: both Mako and her mother were really worried on Sunday because they left the house without going through their usual beauty routines. Ladies, if you're reading this, believe me when I tell you that any human being who is seriously concerned you are not wearing makeup is a douchebag - especially if you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby!
For those of you clamoring for more baby details, here they are. My son was born on June 22nd at 2:33 AM. At the time, he was 1' 8" and weighed 7 lbs 7 oz. These seem to be above-average numbers in Japan; he is noticeably larger than the other babies I see in the maternity ward. So far, his appearance is more Asian than Caucasian. His hair color, eye color, eye shape and skin tone all resemble his mother's more than my own. However, we all agree that facially, he looks like me in some way, particularly the eyes and nose. Watching these features develop over time will be very exciting.
One weird thing I must talk about are his hands. When I first saw him after the nurses toweled him off, his hands were pale, wrinkled and the fingernails were a dark crimson. In other words, he had what I would call "wizard hands." Subsequent washing and nail trimming has made them more human than magic-user, but they still seem quite wrinkled. Mako thinks they look like my hands even though he has her nails. No one has laid claim to his feet yet.
Of course, the big question everyone wants to know is "what is the baby's name?" While I was coy about this for a long time, the fact is we picked two names (one male, one female) months ago. Once we learned the gender we threw out the girl's name and have been using his name ever since. Some late-term kicking made me jokingly refer to him as "Bruce Lee Feit" for a stretch, something Mako immediately mock-embraced and then latched onto for a while, but otherwise all that time I pretended we were still deciding, we weren't. I just wanted to say the baby's name to his face before telling other people.
Now that he's heard it, I can tell you all my son's name is...
GO
In Japanese, that's written with the following character:
...which means "great," "powerful" or as I like to think of it, "awesome." It also represents Australia in certain contexts, which is pretty random. I guess we'll have to take a trip there someday.
(If you just want to learn more about this character, including seeing a list of words that use it, you can visit this page for more information)
It took us a long time to settle on GO. Mako, much to my surprise, was more interested in Western sounding names than I was. As I previously mentioned, she was quite fond of "DJ" (as in "Daniel Junior") and it took some stern refusals on my part to force her to drop it. Meanwhile, I wanted a Japanese name from the start but Mako shot down all of my ideas as being too old-fashioned or because she felt they were inspired by anime or movies. I still maintain Kenshiro Feit would be an incredible name for a child but she disagreed. Vehemently.
In the end, GO satisfied us both and it had the added benefit of being instantly recognizable to both English and Japanese speakers. Japanese doesn't use a lot of vowel sounds but the way certain names are romanized, it can be confusing if you are unfamiliar with the language. Cool names like Ryu and Iori would only confuse my American family and friends, and certain English-derived Japanese names would be romanized in odd ways (i.e. Rei/Ray or Tomu/Tom) GO is simple, straightforward and if I may say so, dynamic.
(Strictly speaking, GO is a long "o" which can be romanized as Gou, Goh or Gô. But much like Tokyo is never written as Toukyou, GO is just going to be GO in my book)
For those curious parties, there will be no middle name or any other artificial names recorded for my son. Middle names are sources of endless confusion in Japan because the custom is not well understood. I can't tell you how many times I've been questioned or forced to rewrite application forms because I neglected to include my middle name or I did so and the clerk misinterpreted it. No, his name is GO. That's that.
For those curious, GO is a Cancer in the West and a Ox/Bull in the East, the latter being particularly popular in Japan. Don't feel pressure to pay attention to either though. I view the whole thing as a curiosity myself, but I have the luxury of being a Scorpion AND a Dragon which is just plain cool. GO shares a birthday with some notable movie-types, such as Meryl Streep, Hong Kong actor/director Stephen Chow and...Bruce Campbell???
Is it too late to name him Bruce?
Labels: family, number one son
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Unbelievable Memories
It's been twenty years since Batman was released in theaters. I remember begging my Mom to take me to an afternoon matinee after Children's Theater to see it and it blew me away. I watched it again on Saturday night and it didn't disappoint, although the new Nolan Batman flicks are noticeably better. Not that Keaton v. Nicholson doesn't rock, but the storytelling is just light-years ahead of the older pictures.
Oh, were you expecting something more relevant to recent events? Fine, look at this:
"I'm Batman." What, like he knows I'm fibbing?
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Oh, were you expecting something more relevant to recent events? Fine, look at this:
"I'm Batman." What, like he knows I'm fibbing?
Labels: family, fuzzy memories, movies, number one son
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, June 22, 2009
The Miracle of Birth
If there's one thing movies and television shows have taught me, the birth of a child is the greatest day of a person's life. Sadly, it seems Hollywood is a habitual liar because I felt that the twenty-four hours I spent in a hospital waiting for my son to be born was one of the worst days of my life. Thankfully it all ended well.
Mako shook me awake around 2:45AM on Sunday morning, clutching herself and saying "We need to go to the hospital." It would later turn out that she had been in pain for nearly two hours prior to that but she stuck it out and waited to see if it would pass. It never did, so we all threw on our clothes and drove to the hospital I was understandably excited, if a little drowsy.
When we arrived I was quite surprised at the lack of initiative from the skeleton crew working the off-hours. Technically speaking, this hospital is "closed" on Sunday but they maintain a side entrance and a small reception desk during these periods. Mako called them before we left so when we arrived, they knew we were coming. That doesn't mean they did anything though. I distinctly remember one man walk past us, acknowledge our presence by simply saying "Ah, Feit-san. Go to the fifth floor." without breaking his stride. You would think a pregnant woman bent over in pain would warrant a wheelchair or some measure of physical assistance, but not here.
The fifth floor was a little busier than the ground floor, probably because there's always something going on in the maternity ward. Newborns arrive when they arrive and both they and their mothers require 24-hour care. Still, despite the buzzing of nurses around us most of the lights were off on the floor, so we spent our initial wait in the dark. Eventually Mako got a bed in the "labor room" and we were told that despite the pain, Mako was only dilated three centimeters and she needed to be at ten centimeters before any serious attempt to give birth could be made. When we asked how long that might take, they said "a while."
I must try to set the scene here by describing the labor room. There is only one room and all expectant mothers have to share it, apparently. I don't know how many beds were in the room but there was little more than a wall and a curtain to separate Mako's bed from the others. Mako was also located right next to the toilet and near the examination chair, so we were in a fairly high traffic section of a very small room. It was here that we had to wait...and wait...and wait...
As noon approached and after repeated claims of "it'll be a bit longer" it was evident that while Mako needed to lie in bed and wait, we didn't all necessarily have to sit next to her until the baby arrived. Mako's mother stayed and encouraged me to go with my father-in-law back to the house and clean up. We were all exhausted, having woken up in the middle of night only to sit and wait for nine hours in the corner of the labor room, so the idea of a shower sounded pretty good. Mako's dad also suggested we have some lunch, which I thought might help me cope with all the stress but it didn't change much. That's how nervous I was: not even eating made me feel better.
We went back to the house and I washed up. My father-in-law told me to try and take a nap which was virtually impossible. Despite all the waiting with no end in sight, I was still worried that the baby would arrive at any moment. I laid down and maybe nodded off for forty minutes or so, but I awoke sharply and scared that I had missed the birth. I hadn't, of course, but I wouldn't feel calm until I was back at the hospital and next to Mako.
Hours and hours went by, and I spent all of them by Mako's side in the corner of this horrible, horrible room. I'm not going to point any fingers here, because I certainly don't have the intestinal fortitude to endure even a tenth of what a pregnant woman goes though, but everything in this labor room carried a horrible stench. The human body generates a lot of foul smelling byproducts and this room was where they all get discharged. The delivery room (when we finally got there) was even worse, but the labor room's odor and total lack of privacy was miserable. Adding insult to injury was that my only seat was a tiny stool with no back and nothing to lean against. Between Mako's bed, her I.V. and the table where we laid out her belongings, there was barely any space for any visitors to sit by the bed.
Eventually I went out again with her father for another meal, but I again spent the entire time thinking only of her. It obviously can't compare to the physical pain a pregnant woman experiences, but to see my wife in such torturous agony all day while she waits and waits was really painful for me. However, the idea of not being with her felt even worse because we had decided together to try and have a baby. Wouldn't leaving her to have the baby without me be a betrayal of our mutual agreement?
Speaking of which, one of the worst things about this shared labor room was overhearing all of the other patients. In the next bed over was a woman who had checked in some time before us. At first she was just sleeping but as the evening approached, she went into the delivery room which was within an audible distance. She shrieked and screamed and we eventually heard the baby's first cries. A little while later, a man showed up and was surprised when he found out the baby was already born. This was obviously the father and I never saw him visit her once that day. Where the fuck was this guy that he couldn't attend his own child's birth or even comfort his wife as she struggled? His failure as a father/husband reminded me why I needed to sit next to Mako and just ignore my back pain and exhaustion. Yes, I left twice to eat meals, but I never left her alone and on both occasions I came back within an hour. At no point was Mako without a member of her family on hand.
As the sun went down, it occurred to me that Mako had just spent the entirety of the Summer Solstice indoors, waiting for this baby. After about seventeen hours, things started to look like the baby was coming. We were still in the labor room but as her dilation increased, Mako was encouraged to try pushing to speed up the process. While I had spent most of the day just sitting with Mako and occasionally massaging her, it was during these initial pushes that I actually had something important to do. Mako was standing up and hugging me, holding onto me for leverage and squeezing with all her might as she tried to push. It was crazy intense and while it would prove futile (and it hurt like hell), it was the undisputed highlight of Sunday because I felt like I mattered.
This is as good a time as any to mention how little attention the hospital staff paid attention to me, which I found deeply insulting. Maybe it's just the culture of Japan to leave the husband out of the birth process, but as I spent my entire Sunday next to my wife trying to console her and assist in the delivery our child, you would think that at one point someone would just start talking to me about something, anything, to acknowledge my constant presence. Instead, I was spoken about but almost never spoken to. The bad news is, I'm pretty sure it was that old-fashioned Japanese racism at work.
For those unfamiliar with Japanese racism, I should explain that it's not actually hateful as much as it's clueless and stupid. I'm sure none of the nurses or doctors felt anything was wrong with me, they just never thought to treat me like a human being. Instead, I was treated like a gaijin. They would ask my wife "where is your husband from?" and "does your husband speak Japanese?" instead of just asking me directly. When they needed our signatures on waivers, they would explain everything to her (while I listened) and then look at me and start stammering, mumbling to themselves "oh, how do I explain this since you cannot read?" Under the circumstances I let it all slide but inside I was pretty pissed.
But I digress...around ten o'clock we finally entered the delivery room. Mako gave it her all but after spending her entire day in pain on a bed without eating (she had no appetite at all), she found herself unable to push the baby out. They put her through a variety of poses, which means they were trying their best but it felt like they didn't really know what to do. Eventually they said there was a "bump" (こぶ in Japanese) and the baby wasn't moving any closer to the exit. Just after one AM, Mako couldn't push anymore and asked them for a C-section. True story: in Japan they call it an "imperial cut" (帝王切開).
They spent almost an hour prepping Mako for surgery and then took her away to the O.R. I was left in the dark (literally) to sit and wait to find out what was going to happen to my family. I was understandably upset by this turn of events. Was there nowhere else I could go? I knew the surgery was routine and carried relatively little risk but that couldn't stop me from worrying about what might happen on the operating table. Let's not forget that it was past two AM and I had been awake for nearly twenty-four straight hours, so I was already a little out of my mind. Being afraid that my wife or my son might not return from the O.R. was terror I didn't need.
My son was the first to appear, shortly before three AM. I wanted to be excited and revel in the moment of seeing my first child in the flesh, but all I could think about was Mako who was still absent. I asked the nurse and all she could say was "they're closing her up." While that was meant as a reassurance, I couldn't put her out of mind even as I looked down at my very healthy brand-new baby boy.
As you can guess, she eventually turned up, as did her parents who must have been up waiting for my messages. Mako was on a stretcher and couldn't sit up, but she was conscious and able to ask me if I saw the baby. I told I did and that made her smile. For all the hell the two of us had gone through (her more than me, of course), having a baby after nine months of anticipation was a wonderful feeling. I suppose if we were going to go with the surgery in the end we could have saved Mako a great many hours of discomfort by asking sooner, but we had hoped for a natural birth. Ah well, at least now my son can totally kill MacBeth.
Tell thee, Feit was from his mother's womb
Untimely ripp'd.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Mako shook me awake around 2:45AM on Sunday morning, clutching herself and saying "We need to go to the hospital." It would later turn out that she had been in pain for nearly two hours prior to that but she stuck it out and waited to see if it would pass. It never did, so we all threw on our clothes and drove to the hospital I was understandably excited, if a little drowsy.
When we arrived I was quite surprised at the lack of initiative from the skeleton crew working the off-hours. Technically speaking, this hospital is "closed" on Sunday but they maintain a side entrance and a small reception desk during these periods. Mako called them before we left so when we arrived, they knew we were coming. That doesn't mean they did anything though. I distinctly remember one man walk past us, acknowledge our presence by simply saying "Ah, Feit-san. Go to the fifth floor." without breaking his stride. You would think a pregnant woman bent over in pain would warrant a wheelchair or some measure of physical assistance, but not here.
The fifth floor was a little busier than the ground floor, probably because there's always something going on in the maternity ward. Newborns arrive when they arrive and both they and their mothers require 24-hour care. Still, despite the buzzing of nurses around us most of the lights were off on the floor, so we spent our initial wait in the dark. Eventually Mako got a bed in the "labor room" and we were told that despite the pain, Mako was only dilated three centimeters and she needed to be at ten centimeters before any serious attempt to give birth could be made. When we asked how long that might take, they said "a while."
I must try to set the scene here by describing the labor room. There is only one room and all expectant mothers have to share it, apparently. I don't know how many beds were in the room but there was little more than a wall and a curtain to separate Mako's bed from the others. Mako was also located right next to the toilet and near the examination chair, so we were in a fairly high traffic section of a very small room. It was here that we had to wait...and wait...and wait...
As noon approached and after repeated claims of "it'll be a bit longer" it was evident that while Mako needed to lie in bed and wait, we didn't all necessarily have to sit next to her until the baby arrived. Mako's mother stayed and encouraged me to go with my father-in-law back to the house and clean up. We were all exhausted, having woken up in the middle of night only to sit and wait for nine hours in the corner of the labor room, so the idea of a shower sounded pretty good. Mako's dad also suggested we have some lunch, which I thought might help me cope with all the stress but it didn't change much. That's how nervous I was: not even eating made me feel better.
We went back to the house and I washed up. My father-in-law told me to try and take a nap which was virtually impossible. Despite all the waiting with no end in sight, I was still worried that the baby would arrive at any moment. I laid down and maybe nodded off for forty minutes or so, but I awoke sharply and scared that I had missed the birth. I hadn't, of course, but I wouldn't feel calm until I was back at the hospital and next to Mako.
Hours and hours went by, and I spent all of them by Mako's side in the corner of this horrible, horrible room. I'm not going to point any fingers here, because I certainly don't have the intestinal fortitude to endure even a tenth of what a pregnant woman goes though, but everything in this labor room carried a horrible stench. The human body generates a lot of foul smelling byproducts and this room was where they all get discharged. The delivery room (when we finally got there) was even worse, but the labor room's odor and total lack of privacy was miserable. Adding insult to injury was that my only seat was a tiny stool with no back and nothing to lean against. Between Mako's bed, her I.V. and the table where we laid out her belongings, there was barely any space for any visitors to sit by the bed.
Eventually I went out again with her father for another meal, but I again spent the entire time thinking only of her. It obviously can't compare to the physical pain a pregnant woman experiences, but to see my wife in such torturous agony all day while she waits and waits was really painful for me. However, the idea of not being with her felt even worse because we had decided together to try and have a baby. Wouldn't leaving her to have the baby without me be a betrayal of our mutual agreement?
Speaking of which, one of the worst things about this shared labor room was overhearing all of the other patients. In the next bed over was a woman who had checked in some time before us. At first she was just sleeping but as the evening approached, she went into the delivery room which was within an audible distance. She shrieked and screamed and we eventually heard the baby's first cries. A little while later, a man showed up and was surprised when he found out the baby was already born. This was obviously the father and I never saw him visit her once that day. Where the fuck was this guy that he couldn't attend his own child's birth or even comfort his wife as she struggled? His failure as a father/husband reminded me why I needed to sit next to Mako and just ignore my back pain and exhaustion. Yes, I left twice to eat meals, but I never left her alone and on both occasions I came back within an hour. At no point was Mako without a member of her family on hand.
As the sun went down, it occurred to me that Mako had just spent the entirety of the Summer Solstice indoors, waiting for this baby. After about seventeen hours, things started to look like the baby was coming. We were still in the labor room but as her dilation increased, Mako was encouraged to try pushing to speed up the process. While I had spent most of the day just sitting with Mako and occasionally massaging her, it was during these initial pushes that I actually had something important to do. Mako was standing up and hugging me, holding onto me for leverage and squeezing with all her might as she tried to push. It was crazy intense and while it would prove futile (and it hurt like hell), it was the undisputed highlight of Sunday because I felt like I mattered.
This is as good a time as any to mention how little attention the hospital staff paid attention to me, which I found deeply insulting. Maybe it's just the culture of Japan to leave the husband out of the birth process, but as I spent my entire Sunday next to my wife trying to console her and assist in the delivery our child, you would think that at one point someone would just start talking to me about something, anything, to acknowledge my constant presence. Instead, I was spoken about but almost never spoken to. The bad news is, I'm pretty sure it was that old-fashioned Japanese racism at work.
For those unfamiliar with Japanese racism, I should explain that it's not actually hateful as much as it's clueless and stupid. I'm sure none of the nurses or doctors felt anything was wrong with me, they just never thought to treat me like a human being. Instead, I was treated like a gaijin. They would ask my wife "where is your husband from?" and "does your husband speak Japanese?" instead of just asking me directly. When they needed our signatures on waivers, they would explain everything to her (while I listened) and then look at me and start stammering, mumbling to themselves "oh, how do I explain this since you cannot read?" Under the circumstances I let it all slide but inside I was pretty pissed.
But I digress...around ten o'clock we finally entered the delivery room. Mako gave it her all but after spending her entire day in pain on a bed without eating (she had no appetite at all), she found herself unable to push the baby out. They put her through a variety of poses, which means they were trying their best but it felt like they didn't really know what to do. Eventually they said there was a "bump" (こぶ in Japanese) and the baby wasn't moving any closer to the exit. Just after one AM, Mako couldn't push anymore and asked them for a C-section. True story: in Japan they call it an "imperial cut" (帝王切開).
They spent almost an hour prepping Mako for surgery and then took her away to the O.R. I was left in the dark (literally) to sit and wait to find out what was going to happen to my family. I was understandably upset by this turn of events. Was there nowhere else I could go? I knew the surgery was routine and carried relatively little risk but that couldn't stop me from worrying about what might happen on the operating table. Let's not forget that it was past two AM and I had been awake for nearly twenty-four straight hours, so I was already a little out of my mind. Being afraid that my wife or my son might not return from the O.R. was terror I didn't need.
My son was the first to appear, shortly before three AM. I wanted to be excited and revel in the moment of seeing my first child in the flesh, but all I could think about was Mako who was still absent. I asked the nurse and all she could say was "they're closing her up." While that was meant as a reassurance, I couldn't put her out of mind even as I looked down at my very healthy brand-new baby boy.
As you can guess, she eventually turned up, as did her parents who must have been up waiting for my messages. Mako was on a stretcher and couldn't sit up, but she was conscious and able to ask me if I saw the baby. I told I did and that made her smile. For all the hell the two of us had gone through (her more than me, of course), having a baby after nine months of anticipation was a wonderful feeling. I suppose if we were going to go with the surgery in the end we could have saved Mako a great many hours of discomfort by asking sooner, but we had hoped for a natural birth. Ah well, at least now my son can totally kill MacBeth.
Tell thee, Feit was from his mother's womb
Untimely ripp'd.
Labels: awkward firsts, family, Japan, marriage, number one son, pregnancy
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Friday, June 19, 2009
Bring on the Crying Infant Already
It's Friday night again and yes, we are still childless. I'm waiting with Mako at her parents' house, just like I did last weekend when I thought we were done with this process. Will the baby be born this weekend? Maybe, but at this point the doctors are just saying the same thing every week: "The baby will come soon." Thanks, Doc!
Besides not sleeping well, a major result of this baby anxiety has been my attitude towards work. I can't really explain it, but with each new day I go to work wondering when my son will be born, the less I want to go to school and put up with what I put up with. It's not that things have been particularly rough this month, I just find myself running low on patience. With all of the stress this waiting has brought me, the little things I endure at work/in Japan have just felt a bit more irritating.
Of course, that goes right back to my issues with spending my entire weekend with my in-laws. My wife is Japanese and I live in Japan, of course, but normally I spend Saturday and Sunday relaxing in a way that offers me an escape from my weekday routine. When I instead come here and stay in their house, I'm spending that much more time "in Japan" and the stress builds up. I may not have to go to work but I'm still being bombarded with Japanese idiosyncrasies and the like while I'm here.
For example, after five days of being peppered with English questions that range from profound to unanswerable, it's a bit of drag for the parade to continue into my weekend. My wife's parents have both, in their own way, been increasingly asking me about the English language and foreign customs. My mother-in-law has even started taking English lessons from somebody and she can't wait to talk to me about what she's been studying. She's also asking me to translate random words into English now, which my coworkers and students have been doing for almost two years.
I know I sound like a pissy, bitter jerk right now, but that's the point. None of these little things are new developments, they're just accumulating en masse at the same time as I'm trying to come to terms with this baby we're having. Stuff I had accepted as part of life in Japan is no longer quietly resting in the back of my mind, easily ignored and tolerated as par for the course. I consider myself pretty adept at dealing with the so-called small stuff, but in my present situation even the small stuff is really getting on my nerves.
I just want this pregnancy to end. I'm sure the baby will present a new world of challenges and none of the things that bother me right now will go away, but that's a different matter entirely. Mako and I will work together to raise the baby. We can't work together to deal with the pregnancy. We are separated both physically and mentally and I've had enough. Give me back my wife, kiddo. Your nine months are up!
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Besides not sleeping well, a major result of this baby anxiety has been my attitude towards work. I can't really explain it, but with each new day I go to work wondering when my son will be born, the less I want to go to school and put up with what I put up with. It's not that things have been particularly rough this month, I just find myself running low on patience. With all of the stress this waiting has brought me, the little things I endure at work/in Japan have just felt a bit more irritating.
Of course, that goes right back to my issues with spending my entire weekend with my in-laws. My wife is Japanese and I live in Japan, of course, but normally I spend Saturday and Sunday relaxing in a way that offers me an escape from my weekday routine. When I instead come here and stay in their house, I'm spending that much more time "in Japan" and the stress builds up. I may not have to go to work but I'm still being bombarded with Japanese idiosyncrasies and the like while I'm here.
For example, after five days of being peppered with English questions that range from profound to unanswerable, it's a bit of drag for the parade to continue into my weekend. My wife's parents have both, in their own way, been increasingly asking me about the English language and foreign customs. My mother-in-law has even started taking English lessons from somebody and she can't wait to talk to me about what she's been studying. She's also asking me to translate random words into English now, which my coworkers and students have been doing for almost two years.
I know I sound like a pissy, bitter jerk right now, but that's the point. None of these little things are new developments, they're just accumulating en masse at the same time as I'm trying to come to terms with this baby we're having. Stuff I had accepted as part of life in Japan is no longer quietly resting in the back of my mind, easily ignored and tolerated as par for the course. I consider myself pretty adept at dealing with the so-called small stuff, but in my present situation even the small stuff is really getting on my nerves.
I just want this pregnancy to end. I'm sure the baby will present a new world of challenges and none of the things that bother me right now will go away, but that's a different matter entirely. Mako and I will work together to raise the baby. We can't work together to deal with the pregnancy. We are separated both physically and mentally and I've had enough. Give me back my wife, kiddo. Your nine months are up!
Labels: family, frustration, Japan, pregnancy
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Thursday, June 18, 2009
I Am Dan's Sleep Starved Brain
I can't sleep. For someone with a nickname like "feitclub," this is very bad news. I'm not talking to myself (at least, not more than usual) and I haven't started plotting against society or anything, but without any self-help groups to cavalierly drop in on, I'm not sure how to correct this problem.
Oh don't worry! I mean, if I lay down in bed I will eventually fade out, but it takes a very long time and I am routinely waking up earlier and earlier in the morning regardless of when I turn in. Last night I went to bed at 11, tossed and turned for over an hour and then woke up around 4:30. I never fully fell asleep again, although I didn't get out of bed until it was almost 6. This is not enough rest for me, especially considering how much energy and liveliness my job demands.
The potential causes, as I see them, are numerous and overlapping. First and foremost is Mako and the frustratingly-unborn son she's still carrying. After her appointment last Friday and some sudden discomfort on Saturday, I was sure this kid was on the fast track for the birth canal. No such luck; it's now Thursday and she feels no closer to delivery than she did at the start of the month. She'll visit the doctor again tomorrow and we'll see what the the prognosis is, but I suspect this hovering uncertainty is definitely preventing me from drifting off into peaceful sleep since I'm so anxious about Mako's condition. The evidence supporting this theory is the fact that I sleep much better on the weekends when I am at her parents' house lying next to her.
Not helping matters is the ever-increasing temperature in my apartment. Technically speaking, Japan is in the midst of its annual rainy season, but it hasn't rained since last week. Instead, each day has been sunny and warm with a rather uncomfortably high level of humidity. I'm not at the point where I've turned on the A/C or started taking a second shower to cool down, but the bedroom is the stuffiest room in our apartment and the oscillating fan can only do so much to help me relax.
Another recent matter that might be adversely affecting my sleeping habits is my new-found video gaming time. Ever since Mako moved back to her parents' house I've been taking advantage of my audio/visual freedom and firing up the consoles on a nightly basis. For a few weeks, Richard and I were blasting our way through Resident Evil 5, so much so that the only trophy left to earn is the big one: complete the game on Professional Mode where the enemies are faster and nearly all of their attacks are lethal. The steep increase in difficulty has proven to be disheartening because the game is a lot less fun now. We've already played through all these stages multiple times to get this far, so repeated failures and restarts on Professional Mode feel like an extraordinary waste of time.
As a departure of sorts, I've finally forced myself to play BioShock and so far, it's every bit as absorbing as I hoped it would be. Indeed, the tension level is as high as any other video game I've ever played. For all the shambling zombie-like foes I've faced in Resident Evil 5, BioShock is the first game that's scared me in a long time. It's not that the mad residents of Rapture are more threatening than waves of infected Africans, it's their world that is so deeply unsettling to me. The so-called "Splicers" who roam the underwater city of Rapture all look like they were attending a party with the ghosts in the Overlook Hotel. Most of them wear odd-looking masks, which is just creepy, and they talk. A lot. Sometimes they yell at me, sometimes they argue amongst themselves, and some of them just babble and wail to no one in particular. There was a freaky moment at the start of the game where I approached a weeping woman who was fawning over a baby carriage. When I bashed her with my pipe wrench, I looked into the carriage to see what she was talking to: a revolver. That's just plain nuts right there.
Well, you get the idea of what I'm dealing with each night. Between worrying about my wife, sweating through my clothes and plugging myself into some intense virtual worlds, it's been difficult for me to just settle down and go to sleep at 11 or even at midnight. I know I should be doing all I can to sleep now before a crying baby moves in with us, but it's not like I'll be able to play many games when he's here. Either way, I'm going to be drowsy, so I might as well have my fun while I can.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Oh don't worry! I mean, if I lay down in bed I will eventually fade out, but it takes a very long time and I am routinely waking up earlier and earlier in the morning regardless of when I turn in. Last night I went to bed at 11, tossed and turned for over an hour and then woke up around 4:30. I never fully fell asleep again, although I didn't get out of bed until it was almost 6. This is not enough rest for me, especially considering how much energy and liveliness my job demands.
The potential causes, as I see them, are numerous and overlapping. First and foremost is Mako and the frustratingly-unborn son she's still carrying. After her appointment last Friday and some sudden discomfort on Saturday, I was sure this kid was on the fast track for the birth canal. No such luck; it's now Thursday and she feels no closer to delivery than she did at the start of the month. She'll visit the doctor again tomorrow and we'll see what the the prognosis is, but I suspect this hovering uncertainty is definitely preventing me from drifting off into peaceful sleep since I'm so anxious about Mako's condition. The evidence supporting this theory is the fact that I sleep much better on the weekends when I am at her parents' house lying next to her.
Not helping matters is the ever-increasing temperature in my apartment. Technically speaking, Japan is in the midst of its annual rainy season, but it hasn't rained since last week. Instead, each day has been sunny and warm with a rather uncomfortably high level of humidity. I'm not at the point where I've turned on the A/C or started taking a second shower to cool down, but the bedroom is the stuffiest room in our apartment and the oscillating fan can only do so much to help me relax.
Another recent matter that might be adversely affecting my sleeping habits is my new-found video gaming time. Ever since Mako moved back to her parents' house I've been taking advantage of my audio/visual freedom and firing up the consoles on a nightly basis. For a few weeks, Richard and I were blasting our way through Resident Evil 5, so much so that the only trophy left to earn is the big one: complete the game on Professional Mode where the enemies are faster and nearly all of their attacks are lethal. The steep increase in difficulty has proven to be disheartening because the game is a lot less fun now. We've already played through all these stages multiple times to get this far, so repeated failures and restarts on Professional Mode feel like an extraordinary waste of time.
As a departure of sorts, I've finally forced myself to play BioShock and so far, it's every bit as absorbing as I hoped it would be. Indeed, the tension level is as high as any other video game I've ever played. For all the shambling zombie-like foes I've faced in Resident Evil 5, BioShock is the first game that's scared me in a long time. It's not that the mad residents of Rapture are more threatening than waves of infected Africans, it's their world that is so deeply unsettling to me. The so-called "Splicers" who roam the underwater city of Rapture all look like they were attending a party with the ghosts in the Overlook Hotel. Most of them wear odd-looking masks, which is just creepy, and they talk. A lot. Sometimes they yell at me, sometimes they argue amongst themselves, and some of them just babble and wail to no one in particular. There was a freaky moment at the start of the game where I approached a weeping woman who was fawning over a baby carriage. When I bashed her with my pipe wrench, I looked into the carriage to see what she was talking to: a revolver. That's just plain nuts right there.
Well, you get the idea of what I'm dealing with each night. Between worrying about my wife, sweating through my clothes and plugging myself into some intense virtual worlds, it's been difficult for me to just settle down and go to sleep at 11 or even at midnight. I know I should be doing all I can to sleep now before a crying baby moves in with us, but it's not like I'll be able to play many games when he's here. Either way, I'm going to be drowsy, so I might as well have my fun while I can.
Labels: BioShock, family, Fight Club, pregnancy, Resident Evil, video games
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Sunday, June 14, 2009
And Baby Makes...me wait
So yeah, what was that news everyone wanted to know about? Oh right, the baby...
Well, the bad news is there is no baby news, really. Mako visited the doctor on Friday and they said "wow, this baby will be here any day now." I spent the whole weekend with her at her parents' in the hopes of being there for the big moment, but the big moment never came. Now it's Sunday night and I'm back home, alone again, with no real understanding of when the baby is due. I'm just going to go to work each day and hope that "the call" doesn't come at an inopportune moment.
The good news is that Mako is in really good spirits about the whole thing. She had her ups and downs during this pregnancy, and I saw sides of her I never, ever want to see again. But right now she's dealing with the physical and emotional sides of this as best she can. We were able to kid around and laugh about the mystery of the birth all weekend.
Something else we did all weekend was eat. It's ironic that my mother warned me not to eat too much junk food while I'm living on my own, because I eat twice as much food when I'm with my in-laws. Not only are there three solid meals a day, but there's an array of cakes, sweets, donuts, and the like. When I'm at home, I may play a lot of games and stay up late watching TV, but I don't stuff my face because the fridge is almost empty. Meanwhile, Mako's mom bought some roll cake this afternoon and while we were eating it, Mako's sister showed up with her family and even more cake. What choice did I have but to keep eating?
So to my mom and dad and everyone else who's waiting to hear about the baby, I must ask you to keep waiting. Trust me, I will shout any developments from the top of my cyber-mountain. In the meantime, you may prepare my Father's Day presents now because my son should be here by Sunday and he's totally not going to give me anything, the little ingrate!
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Well, the bad news is there is no baby news, really. Mako visited the doctor on Friday and they said "wow, this baby will be here any day now." I spent the whole weekend with her at her parents' in the hopes of being there for the big moment, but the big moment never came. Now it's Sunday night and I'm back home, alone again, with no real understanding of when the baby is due. I'm just going to go to work each day and hope that "the call" doesn't come at an inopportune moment.
The good news is that Mako is in really good spirits about the whole thing. She had her ups and downs during this pregnancy, and I saw sides of her I never, ever want to see again. But right now she's dealing with the physical and emotional sides of this as best she can. We were able to kid around and laugh about the mystery of the birth all weekend.
Something else we did all weekend was eat. It's ironic that my mother warned me not to eat too much junk food while I'm living on my own, because I eat twice as much food when I'm with my in-laws. Not only are there three solid meals a day, but there's an array of cakes, sweets, donuts, and the like. When I'm at home, I may play a lot of games and stay up late watching TV, but I don't stuff my face because the fridge is almost empty. Meanwhile, Mako's mom bought some roll cake this afternoon and while we were eating it, Mako's sister showed up with her family and even more cake. What choice did I have but to keep eating?
So to my mom and dad and everyone else who's waiting to hear about the baby, I must ask you to keep waiting. Trust me, I will shout any developments from the top of my cyber-mountain. In the meantime, you may prepare my Father's Day presents now because my son should be here by Sunday and he's totally not going to give me anything, the little ingrate!
Labels: family, food, pregnancy
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, June 08, 2009
T-minus Whenever it Feels Right
So it seems everyone has baby questions for me and the answer to all of them is "soon." The baby will be born soon, Mako will enter the hospital soon, we will formally declare the baby's name soon, and I'm going to be pushed one step closer to adulthood soon. What I can't say is "when" because we simply don't know. But it's soon, that's for sure.
I spent Friday night with Mako at her parents' house again and while that isn't getting any easier, at least I get to sleep. For reasons I cannot explain I have not been sleeping well in my own bed. It could be a simple matter of not having my wife next to me, or maybe it's just stress, but since Mako went back to her childhood home I have barely managed to sleep more than four or five hours at a time. True, I should be going to bed earlier as it is harder to resist TV and video games when you're alone, but even when I lay down before eleven I'll wake up once or twice during the night.
Mako is really caught between her needs and her wants right now. She tells me about things she wants to do all the time, but with all that weight and a new life form squirming around inside her she simply cannot do much of anything without a long rest before, during, and after. Even going to the movies is out of the question for her, which is a shame because she seems interested in Terminator 4 and it's opening in Japan real soon. I would have thought sitting down would be an easy activity in her condition but it seems that she's worried about having to sit STILL for such a long time. Plus she's been having some issues with her feet that are best dealt with by elevating her lower half. There's certainly no room for that in a movie theater.
I really feel torn about how our lives are being wedged apart right now, even if it's only temporary. I can't just go down there everyday because it's too far. I could spend my weekends there but I fear my sanity would snap. There's so much pressure being a guest in someone's house, especially an overnight guest and especially especially one who has to really concentrate to communicate at all. So I've been spending one night a week there and then leaving, even though I feel lonely when I'm at home all by myself. I feel bad when she's not around but I can't manage to be with her for more than eighteen hours or so because there's nothing for us to do. It's a weird Catch-22 and it's entirely in my own head.
At the very least, I didn't spend Saturday night alone. I went out to Osaka and met Alex and another friend of his, Rachel. We didn't really "go" anywhere or "do" anything as much as we went out on the streets and spent the evening together. We found great amusement in people watching in Dotonbori (this trash collector and this apparent performance artist being two of the highlights) and enjoyed a delicious Western-style pizza at nearby Slices in Amerika-mura. Eventually we wandered into a cheapo karaoke joint that had shoddy drink service and questionable song selection but it more than made for it in price. I spent less than 1000 Yen for two hours which is an incredible bargain, especially for a Saturday night. Combine that with our policy of buying drinks in convenience stores rather than bars and we all managed to have a great night without spending much money at all.
Meanwhile, it's Monday again and I find myself still "single" and no closer to understanding when my life will completely change. Will the baby arrive in time for Father's Day? Will it be born during the week? Will it be born tomorrow? Perhaps that's what's keeping me up at night more than anything else. At least when I sleep next to Mako, I know that IF the baby decides to join us, I'll be right by her side. If the baby comes in the middle of the night and we're apart, well, I don't have a car and there are no trains...
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I spent Friday night with Mako at her parents' house again and while that isn't getting any easier, at least I get to sleep. For reasons I cannot explain I have not been sleeping well in my own bed. It could be a simple matter of not having my wife next to me, or maybe it's just stress, but since Mako went back to her childhood home I have barely managed to sleep more than four or five hours at a time. True, I should be going to bed earlier as it is harder to resist TV and video games when you're alone, but even when I lay down before eleven I'll wake up once or twice during the night.
Mako is really caught between her needs and her wants right now. She tells me about things she wants to do all the time, but with all that weight and a new life form squirming around inside her she simply cannot do much of anything without a long rest before, during, and after. Even going to the movies is out of the question for her, which is a shame because she seems interested in Terminator 4 and it's opening in Japan real soon. I would have thought sitting down would be an easy activity in her condition but it seems that she's worried about having to sit STILL for such a long time. Plus she's been having some issues with her feet that are best dealt with by elevating her lower half. There's certainly no room for that in a movie theater.
I really feel torn about how our lives are being wedged apart right now, even if it's only temporary. I can't just go down there everyday because it's too far. I could spend my weekends there but I fear my sanity would snap. There's so much pressure being a guest in someone's house, especially an overnight guest and especially especially one who has to really concentrate to communicate at all. So I've been spending one night a week there and then leaving, even though I feel lonely when I'm at home all by myself. I feel bad when she's not around but I can't manage to be with her for more than eighteen hours or so because there's nothing for us to do. It's a weird Catch-22 and it's entirely in my own head.
At the very least, I didn't spend Saturday night alone. I went out to Osaka and met Alex and another friend of his, Rachel. We didn't really "go" anywhere or "do" anything as much as we went out on the streets and spent the evening together. We found great amusement in people watching in Dotonbori (this trash collector and this apparent performance artist being two of the highlights) and enjoyed a delicious Western-style pizza at nearby Slices in Amerika-mura. Eventually we wandered into a cheapo karaoke joint that had shoddy drink service and questionable song selection but it more than made for it in price. I spent less than 1000 Yen for two hours which is an incredible bargain, especially for a Saturday night. Combine that with our policy of buying drinks in convenience stores rather than bars and we all managed to have a great night without spending much money at all.
Meanwhile, it's Monday again and I find myself still "single" and no closer to understanding when my life will completely change. Will the baby arrive in time for Father's Day? Will it be born during the week? Will it be born tomorrow? Perhaps that's what's keeping me up at night more than anything else. At least when I sleep next to Mako, I know that IF the baby decides to join us, I'll be right by her side. If the baby comes in the middle of the night and we're apart, well, I don't have a car and there are no trains...
 | 687 |
 | |
25  | |
 | |
| lab.drwicked.com | |
Labels: Alex, family, friends, Osaka, predicting the future, pregnancy
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Monday, June 01, 2009
Digital Life Management
For my 1000th blog post, I need to ask you readers a question: do I share too much?
I hope your answer is "no" because I don't feel that way at all, but I just recently ran into some Japanese Internet issues that forced me to think about what it is that I do, digitally speaking.
For starters, I picked this domain name in 2004 because it is a pun featuring my own last name. I subsequently went on to use feitclub as my username on a number of online forums and other websites (most of which are gathered on my contact page). It's a pretty thin veil of anonymity because I didn't really consider using my own name online to be a problem. Yet I can remember a lot of people being extremely nervous when they heard I was starting a blog and writing about myself on the Internet using my own name. They felt something about that was inherently dangerous and I couldn't understand why.
Flash forward to today and I live in a country where that attitude is widespread: Japan is afraid of the Internet. I had heard that before from What Japan Thinks but this article (and this recent non-controversy) really sum up the matter quite well. I had always assumed Japanese web pages sucked because they were designed with mobile phones in mind, but he argues that the real reason is a general distrust of the Internet as a medium. Fear of new technology isn't unheard of but sometimes I feel like Japan is almost trying to wait it out, as if the Internet is just going to go away someday.
This fear hit home not too long ago when Mako casually commanded me to never post a picture of our baby on the Internet. She said she had no objections to sending pictures to friends or family, but putting up a picture for everyone to see is apparently out of the question. When I asked why, all she could say was "It's my baby." I didn't argue because she is very pregnant right now and completely unstable, so she says a lot of things that don't make sense or at least contradict her own long-held opinions. At one point last month she said she never wanted to go to America again, but this weekend she couldn't stop talking about visiting Boston after seeing a TV special about the city (and its cuisine).
Even if she reverses herself or doesn't even remember making such a declaration, I am wondering if she is actually right. Between this blog, Twitter, and Facebook, I am producing a steady of stream of words and images featuring and starring me. My life is hardly an open book (there's plenty of stuff that cannot/should not be made public) but I offer the Internet a substantial look at my life. That's something I have chosen to do and I enjoy it. If nothing else, it's a fun exercise to keep myself writing and it serves as a record of what I'm up to should I ever need to recall what Mako and I ate on our first date. Mako is basically along for the ride, posing for silly pictures knowing full well they will end up on the Internet. However, it will be years before our son is old enough to grasp what the hell an Internet is. Is it right to simply decide that he is on board with all this?
Allow me to answer my own question, because I just realized I'm looking at this the wrong way: Yes, it is OK for me to make these decisions for my son because I am his father. It's going to be my job to decide a lot of things concerning my son for decades. These decisions will run the gamut from trivial (i.e. choosing when we take family vacations) to fundamental (disciplining him if he steals something), and that will include encouraging him to embrace certain cultural phenomena that I enjoy. There's nothing sinister or Orwellian about it; in fact, the reason I know the word "Orwellian" is because my father gave me Animal Farm to read when I was in second grade.
Indeed, there were a lot of interests my father tried to pass on to me when I was growing up. My father loved baseball when I was a kid, and so did I. I would hope my son will learn to love it too (He doesn't have to love the Yankees, of course, just so long as he doesn't choose the Red Sox). My father was fascinated by history, especially military history. He took us to Civil War battlefields as a family and played strategic war games with his friends. He loved skiing and sailing. I didn't embrace all of these things, but I know that being exposed to all of them had an affect on me. I'm sure all the traveling we did encouraged me to visit Japan when I did.
As for me, I am not scared of the Internet and I hope my son grows up accepting it as a part of his life. He doesn't need to write his own blog or anything, but I don't want him to feel like the Internet represents some kind of threat to his privacy. Of course, I am not a dictator. These kinds of decisions will be made by the two of us and if Mako holds her ground, you may not be seeing any pictures of our son on the Internet at all. She has just as much right to shape our child as I do, and in the big picture this isn't something worth fighting over. It's not like she'll be raising him as a Luddite. Whatever happens, I hope my son will at least come to view the Internet as something that can be both fun and useful. After all, no matter where he decides to live in the future, he will need to use it to keep in touch with half of his family. I don't want that to become a chore that he loathes.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
I hope your answer is "no" because I don't feel that way at all, but I just recently ran into some Japanese Internet issues that forced me to think about what it is that I do, digitally speaking.
For starters, I picked this domain name in 2004 because it is a pun featuring my own last name. I subsequently went on to use feitclub as my username on a number of online forums and other websites (most of which are gathered on my contact page). It's a pretty thin veil of anonymity because I didn't really consider using my own name online to be a problem. Yet I can remember a lot of people being extremely nervous when they heard I was starting a blog and writing about myself on the Internet using my own name. They felt something about that was inherently dangerous and I couldn't understand why.
Flash forward to today and I live in a country where that attitude is widespread: Japan is afraid of the Internet. I had heard that before from What Japan Thinks but this article (and this recent non-controversy) really sum up the matter quite well. I had always assumed Japanese web pages sucked because they were designed with mobile phones in mind, but he argues that the real reason is a general distrust of the Internet as a medium. Fear of new technology isn't unheard of but sometimes I feel like Japan is almost trying to wait it out, as if the Internet is just going to go away someday.
This fear hit home not too long ago when Mako casually commanded me to never post a picture of our baby on the Internet. She said she had no objections to sending pictures to friends or family, but putting up a picture for everyone to see is apparently out of the question. When I asked why, all she could say was "It's my baby." I didn't argue because she is very pregnant right now and completely unstable, so she says a lot of things that don't make sense or at least contradict her own long-held opinions. At one point last month she said she never wanted to go to America again, but this weekend she couldn't stop talking about visiting Boston after seeing a TV special about the city (and its cuisine).
Even if she reverses herself or doesn't even remember making such a declaration, I am wondering if she is actually right. Between this blog, Twitter, and Facebook, I am producing a steady of stream of words and images featuring and starring me. My life is hardly an open book (there's plenty of stuff that cannot/should not be made public) but I offer the Internet a substantial look at my life. That's something I have chosen to do and I enjoy it. If nothing else, it's a fun exercise to keep myself writing and it serves as a record of what I'm up to should I ever need to recall what Mako and I ate on our first date. Mako is basically along for the ride, posing for silly pictures knowing full well they will end up on the Internet. However, it will be years before our son is old enough to grasp what the hell an Internet is. Is it right to simply decide that he is on board with all this?
Allow me to answer my own question, because I just realized I'm looking at this the wrong way: Yes, it is OK for me to make these decisions for my son because I am his father. It's going to be my job to decide a lot of things concerning my son for decades. These decisions will run the gamut from trivial (i.e. choosing when we take family vacations) to fundamental (disciplining him if he steals something), and that will include encouraging him to embrace certain cultural phenomena that I enjoy. There's nothing sinister or Orwellian about it; in fact, the reason I know the word "Orwellian" is because my father gave me Animal Farm to read when I was in second grade.
Indeed, there were a lot of interests my father tried to pass on to me when I was growing up. My father loved baseball when I was a kid, and so did I. I would hope my son will learn to love it too (He doesn't have to love the Yankees, of course, just so long as he doesn't choose the Red Sox). My father was fascinated by history, especially military history. He took us to Civil War battlefields as a family and played strategic war games with his friends. He loved skiing and sailing. I didn't embrace all of these things, but I know that being exposed to all of them had an affect on me. I'm sure all the traveling we did encouraged me to visit Japan when I did.
As for me, I am not scared of the Internet and I hope my son grows up accepting it as a part of his life. He doesn't need to write his own blog or anything, but I don't want him to feel like the Internet represents some kind of threat to his privacy. Of course, I am not a dictator. These kinds of decisions will be made by the two of us and if Mako holds her ground, you may not be seeing any pictures of our son on the Internet at all. She has just as much right to shape our child as I do, and in the big picture this isn't something worth fighting over. It's not like she'll be raising him as a Luddite. Whatever happens, I hope my son will at least come to view the Internet as something that can be both fun and useful. After all, no matter where he decides to live in the future, he will need to use it to keep in touch with half of his family. I don't want that to become a chore that he loathes.
Labels: family, Internet issues, Japan, marriage, pregnancy, site news
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Horrible, Horrible Freedom
I think Japan may be getting over its "new flu" fears. The people are clearly less rattled than their government thinks they should be. Karaoke establishments here in Kansai have started turning away younger customers who have been taking advantage of the school closings to exercise their vocal cords. On the other hand, stores still report that these flimsy masks are flying off the shelves. I actually got some surprised looks at school this week, not because I was wearing a mask but because I even had a mask to wear. Maybe I should sell the ones I've got left?
Of course, that wouldn't make Mako very happy if I didn't take this new flu business as seriously as she does. We talk on the phone at least once a day and she has been adamant that I wear my mask when I go out. I can understand why she would be so nervous about this disease because she's pregnant and that would certainly complicate any illness she might contract at this point. Her cold late last month was a real doozy and that was just a cold. But why does she extend her fears onto me? I'm hardly a picture of health with my surplus girth and periodic sniffles, but I rarely get seriously ill. I think I've had one fever in the past eighteen months.
This feeds right into the big question that has been on my mind: was this new flu quasi-vacation perfectly timed to coincide with Mako's departure, or is this case of really, really bad timing? While I have been required to show up at work each day this week and do nothing, the staff has recognized my superfluousness in this non-crisis and has been letting me go home quite early. I stopped bringing a lunch to work after two days because it was easier to just buy something on my return trip. As nice as it was to spend so much time at home this week, I think it magnified how empty my apartment feels without Mako. Sure, I appreciate having total control over the TV for once, but my "victory" is a hollow one without anyone to welcome me home or lay next to me in bed.
Schools should re-open tomorrow so I expect to go back to work and, you know, work for the first time since last Friday. I believe that will make all the difference in coping with my new-found bachelorhood. After a long day of screaming at children, I think it will be nice to just play a video game or watch Star Trek reruns. But if that's all I do (as was the case this past week), it underscores how lonely I feel without Mako around. There was a time in my life when I could do whatever I wanted in my apartment without having to consider anyone else's feelings. Those were not carefree happy days, so reliving them is best done in small doses. Until Mako comes back home (with our son!) I must enjoy these bits of solitary time without getting carrying away. Keeping busy will go a long way towards maintaining a balance between responsibility and total slackerdom.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Of course, that wouldn't make Mako very happy if I didn't take this new flu business as seriously as she does. We talk on the phone at least once a day and she has been adamant that I wear my mask when I go out. I can understand why she would be so nervous about this disease because she's pregnant and that would certainly complicate any illness she might contract at this point. Her cold late last month was a real doozy and that was just a cold. But why does she extend her fears onto me? I'm hardly a picture of health with my surplus girth and periodic sniffles, but I rarely get seriously ill. I think I've had one fever in the past eighteen months.
This feeds right into the big question that has been on my mind: was this new flu quasi-vacation perfectly timed to coincide with Mako's departure, or is this case of really, really bad timing? While I have been required to show up at work each day this week and do nothing, the staff has recognized my superfluousness in this non-crisis and has been letting me go home quite early. I stopped bringing a lunch to work after two days because it was easier to just buy something on my return trip. As nice as it was to spend so much time at home this week, I think it magnified how empty my apartment feels without Mako. Sure, I appreciate having total control over the TV for once, but my "victory" is a hollow one without anyone to welcome me home or lay next to me in bed.
Schools should re-open tomorrow so I expect to go back to work and, you know, work for the first time since last Friday. I believe that will make all the difference in coping with my new-found bachelorhood. After a long day of screaming at children, I think it will be nice to just play a video game or watch Star Trek reruns. But if that's all I do (as was the case this past week), it underscores how lonely I feel without Mako around. There was a time in my life when I could do whatever I wanted in my apartment without having to consider anyone else's feelings. Those were not carefree happy days, so reliving them is best done in small doses. Until Mako comes back home (with our son!) I must enjoy these bits of solitary time without getting carrying away. Keeping busy will go a long way towards maintaining a balance between responsibility and total slackerdom.
Labels: family, Japan, new flu
つづく...(Click here to read more)
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Bit o' the Business
Looks like I picked the wrong week to start writing again.
First of all, Happy Birthday to The Trout. I know you were just here and I did pay for those burgers, but I still feel like I owe you a respectable birthday gift. After all, you didn't "keep" those burgers for more than an hour, tops.
Secondly, I had no time to sit down and write about stuff last week, but it's looking like I've got no time to sit down and write about stuff this week either. I've got a couple non-personal things in progress right now, but even if I upload one of those it won't offer much insight into me...which is kind of the goal of the blog.
Part of the problem has been me being awfully busy at work, as nearly every school has increased their English classes. It feels a bit hollow because they basically let April go with relatively few lessons and many schools continue to slack in the preparation department, meaning that I spend more time in the classroom but don't accomplish anything more than I did before. But that's irrelevant, frankly, because I am working more which means I'm writing less.
Also, things at home are getting...rocky. I'm not going to point any fingers or complain, but instead I'm just going to say this loud and clear: THANK JEBUS I CANNOT GET PREGNANT. It is obvious to me that the physical burden of carrying a baby would break my brain and warp my personality, because that's exactly what it's doing to Mako and she is way stronger than I am, emotionally speaking. She has also come down with a cold (a nasty one too), pouring gas on the already raging "I feel like hell" inferno.
So I come home after a long day at work and then I must contend with a completely unpredictable pregnant wife. Is she mad at me about something, or simply not feeling well enough to get out of bed? I never know and Mako, for whatever reason, will never say which issue is vexing her. Regardless of her mood, Mako needs more help and I simply cannot lounge on the Internet like I used to.
The good news is that Mako is going back to her parents' house for a few weeks...or maybe a couple months, depending on how soon this baby arrives and how the delivery goes. Once she's there, she can relax because her mother will take care of her and I can relax because I know she's got folks watching her all day. When she's here, I know Mako pushes herself way too hard. She is constantly cleaning things, things that in no way demand the attention she lavishes upon them. When she felt better, it didn't matter as much because she had all day to do as she pleased. Now, her energy is severely depleted but that still won't stop her from walking to the farther supermarket or scrubbing the tub on all fours. No way her mom will allow that kind of nonsense under her roof.
Once the "move" is over, I'll have more to do at home but I'll also have more time to do as I please. That means more gaming and more writing (not necessarily in that order). It'll be like a quick return to bachelorhood before that baby changes everything. Until then, I'm indisposed. My apologies.
つづく...(Click here to read more)
First of all, Happy Birthday to The Trout. I know you were just here and I did pay for those burgers, but I still feel like I owe you a respectable birthday gift. After all, you didn't "keep" those burgers for more than an hour, tops.
Secondly, I had no time to sit down and write about stuff last week, but it's looking like I've got no time to sit down and write about stuff this week either. I've got a couple non-personal things in progress right now, but even if I upload one of those it won't offer much insight into me...which is kind of the goal of the blog.
Part of the problem has been me being awfully busy at work, as nearly every school has increased their English classes. It feels a bit hollow because they basically let April go with relatively few lessons and many schools continue to slack in the preparation department, meaning that I spend more time in the classroom but don't accomplish anything more than I did before. But that's irrelevant, frankly, because I am working more which means I'm writing less.
Also, things at home are getting...rocky. I'm not going to point any fingers or complain, but instead I'm just going to say this loud and clear: THANK JEBUS I CANNOT GET PREGNANT. It is obvious to me that the physical burden of carrying a baby would break my brain and warp my personality, because that's exactly what it's doing to Mako and she is way stronger than I am, emotionally speaking. She has also come down with a cold (a nasty one too), pouring gas on the already raging "I feel like hell" inferno.
So I come home after a long day at work and then I must contend with a completely unpredictable pregnant wife. Is she mad at me about something, or simply not feeling well enough to get out of bed? I never know and Mako, for whatever reason, will never say which issue is vexing her. Regardless of her mood, Mako needs more help and I simply cannot lounge on the Internet like I used to.
The good news is that Mako is going back to her parents' house for a few weeks...or maybe a couple months, depending on how soon this baby arrives and how the delivery goes. Once she's there, she can relax because her mother will take care of her and I can relax because I know she's got folks watching her all day. When she's here, I know Mako pushes herself way too hard. She is constantly cleaning things, things that in no way demand the attention she lavishes upon them. When she felt better, it didn't matter as much because she had all day to do as she pleased. Now, her energy is severely depleted but that still won't stop her from walking to the farther supermarket or scrubbing the tub on all fours. No way her mom will allow that kind of nonsense under her roof.
Once the "move" is over, I'll have more to do at home but I'll also have more time to do as I please. That means more gaming and more writing (not necessarily in that order). It'll be like a quick return to bachelorhood before that baby changes everything. Until then, I'm indisposed. My apologies.
Labels: family, pregnancy, teaching, Trout
つづく...(Click here to read more)
